101 - Pilot Aired September 17, 2013

Pilot

A strict new captain, Raymond Holt, means trouble for the squad's carefree, yet brilliant, detective Jake Peralta. Meanwhile, Boyle repeatedly tries to ask Rosa out on a date.

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Guest Stars: Fred Armisen as Mlepnos, Mike Hagerty as Captain McGinley, Joel McKinnon Miller as Scully, Anthony Azizi as Ahmed, Dirk Blocker as Hitchcock, Nick Gracer as Rakto, Rob Kerkovich as Bunder, Joe Jefferson as Old Man

Writers: Dan Goor, Michael Schur

Director: Phil Lord, Christopher Miller

Available on Amazon.comAvailable on iTunes

Episode Quotes

Jake: Captain, hey. Welcome to the murder.

Captain Holt: Sergeant, you were in the 1-8 with me. Though you were significantly-
Sergeant Jeffords: Fatter, sir. They called me Terry Titties. Because I had large-
Captain Holt: Titties. Yes, I remember. I never liked that nickname. Though, to be fair, it was accurate.

Captain Holt: Tell me about Peralta.
Sergeant Jeffords: Jacob Peralta is my best detective. He likes putting away bad guys and he loves solving puzzles. The only puzzle he hasn't solved is how to grow up.
Captain Holt: That was very well put.
Sergeant Jeffords: I've talked a lot about Jake in my departmentally-mandated therapy session.

Captain Holt: First of all, I think you're kind of overdoing it with the manscaping. But more importantly, detective, why do you refuse to take my orders seriously?

Gina: I will tell you on six conditions. Number one, you let me use your office to practice my dance moves. Second-
Captain Holt: How about this? If you tell me, I won't have you suspended without pay.
Gina: Oh, that sounds great.

Recap

At an electronics store, Jake gives the "Donnie Brasco" speech to camera. Jake and Amy are at the store following a robbery. Despite his hijinks, Jake has already solved the case with the help of a nanny-cam hidden in a toy bear he found in the store when he showed up five minutes before Amy.

Back at the precinct, Jake interrupts a briefing to make Amy update their tally count on the board. Jake and Amy have a bet over who can get the most arrests, and Jake is narrowly ahead. Jack tells the squad about a new murder case. Earlier that morning, somebody shot and killed a luxury food importer.

At his desk, Jake talks to the squad about the new captain, who is set to arrive soon. Jake is sure the new captain is going to be another "washed-up pencil pusher who's only concerned with following every rule in the patrol guide". As Jake mocks the "robot captain", Raymond Holt walks up behind him. Captain Holt harangues Jake for his terrible robot impression and tells him he should be wearing a necktie the next time he sees him. Captain Holt gives a short introductory speech, which impresses Amy and Gina.

In his new office, Captain Holt talks to Sergeant Jeffords about the squad. Terry fills him in on everybody in the squad, explaining the bet between Amy and Jake which has seen their arrest numbers soar. Captain Holt says the precinct is doing fine, but he wants to make it the best one in Brooklyn, starting with Jake.

At the crime scene, Jake, Boyle, Amy and Rosa collect evidence while they talk about their new captain. As Jake complains about having to wear a tie, the Captain sneaks up behind him again. Captain Holt puts Jake and Amy on door duty, talking to residents of the building to see if the victim's neighbors know anything. Boyle and Rosa are told to check in with the coroner. On the way there, Boyle invites Rosa to an old movie festival, and she agrees. Boyle suggests seeing Citizen Kane, but Rosa thinks that's a terrible movie.

Captain Holt talks to Gina in his office about Amy and Jake's bet. Gina explains that Amy stands to get Jake's prized Mustang if she wins the bet, while Jake would get a date with Amy if he is victorious. Meanwhile, Jake and Amy go door to door in the building, but the neighbors are no help at all.

Back at the precinct, the squad study the coroner's report which provides no new clues. When Captain Holt again tells Jake to wear a tie, Jake reveals he is wearing one - only under his shirt. Captain Holt wonders why Jake refuses to take his orders seriously. After Holt asks the squad if anybody knows why it's so important to him that they all dress appropriately, not one of the four highly-trained detectives can solve that simple mystery.

At a grocery store, Jake and Boyle confront a suspect who immediately tries to escape, triggering a food fight in the store. The suspect gets away. Back at the precinct, Jake is unhappy that Holt put him on records room duty. Sergeant Jeffords defends Captain Holt to Jake, explaining that he has forgotten more about policing than Jake will ever know. Terry mentions a case the Captain solved in 1981, the "Disco Strangler".

In the bullpen, Rosa asks Charles which movie they will be seeing at the festival. When Boyle says he bought tickets to all of them "to be safe", explaining that he didn't want to mess up and Rosa's "sort of opinionated". Rosa tells Boyle they won't be seeing a movie together.

When Captain Holt visits the records room, he finds Jake wearing a tie - but without any pants, just a speedo. Jake explains that he found a file which links their suspect to a storage unit. The Captain calls the rest of the squad in to congratulate Jake on his find.

Amy, Jake and the Captain sit in a police car as they stake out the storage unit. Jake congratulates Holt on solving the "Disco Strangler" case. After Jake wonders why it took Holt so long to get his own precinct, Captain Holt explains that it's because he's gay. Meanwhile, Boyle and Rosa sit in another police car. Rosa gives Boyle money for all the movie tickets he bought. Although Rosa still won't see a movie with Boyle, she tells him he's sweet and she likes his company.

Captain Holt explains how the NYPD was not ready for an openly gay detective when he came out 25 years ago. Then the old guard died out and the NYPD couldn't wait to show off the fact they had a high ranking gay officer. He made Captain, but then they moved him to a public affairs unit. Captain Holt explains his own unit was all he really wanted. Now he's finally got it, he's not going to screw it up. Jake apologizes for acting like a jackass. Jake cuts his apology short when he spots Ratko.

Inside the storage unit, the whole squad moves in on Ratko, leaving him no option but to surrender. Jake finally figures out why the Captain is so insistent about uniform. They're a team and the tie is part of the uniform. The Captain was kept off the team for so long, but now he's the coach he wants them all to wear the same uniform.