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Quote from Jake in the episode Yippie Kayak

Jake: So, just to recap, you left an unmarked package on a police captain's desk on a random Monday with a suspicious message written on it that looked like it was scrawled by a crazy person.
Amy: Uh-huh.
Captain Holt: Bomb. There's a bomb. Everyone out! Let's go. This is not a drill.
Jake: Great gift, babe.

Quote from Charles in the episode Yippie Kayak

Boyle: Ho, ho, ho, Jake. Special delivery from Santa's elf. Merry Christmas.
"Heart Attack Soda"
Jake: Holy crap. I love this stuff. You know, technically it's just carbonated fudge.
Boyle: I know.
Jake: I thought they banned it.
Boyle: Not in Syria. They use it to induce labor in goats.

Quote from Gina in the episode Yippie Kayak

Jake: Gina, I screwed up. I forgot to get Charles anything.
Gina: Oh, well, I always knew he would die of sadness.

Quote from Jake in the episode Yippie Kayak

Jake: I was just so focused on Amy's gift that I completely spaced, and his present to me was so personal. Okay, think, what does Charles love? Gross food, tan pants, Masterchef Junior. Ooh, I could call up one of those kids and offer them a free trip to New York.
Gina: I wouldn't do that.
Jake: Right, because I'm a stranger and I shouldn't be luring them out of state. Good call.

Quote from Rosa in the episode Yippie Kayak

Captain Holt: Diaz, are we still on for the polar bear swim tonight?
Rosa: It's either that or go carolling with my family, so yeah. I'd rather walk into the freezing ocean.

Quote from Amy in the episode Yippie Kayak

Amy: This one thinks July 18th is mid-July!

Quote from Captain Holt in the episode Yippie Kayak

Amy: You guys think I'm some kind of wimp, but I'm not. I'm tough and I'm strong, and I love to splash around in chilly water.
Captain Holt: It's not chilly. It's as cold as the waters of Cocytus, the frozen lake of hell.

Quote from Amy in the episode Yippie Kayak

Amy: I'll see you there. I can't wait to dunk my junk.

Quote from Charles in the episode Yippie Kayak

Jake: It's also not necessary to touch my face.
Boyle: It's Christmas. A time for friendship.

Quote from Gina in the episode Yippie Kayak

Jake: All right, I guess you'll just have to distract him when we get to the store.
Gina: On it. I'll take him to housewares and I'll ask him the difference between a skillet and a frying pan. That'll buy you six hours.

Quote from Gina in the episode Yippie Kayak

Jake: Gina, you just saved Christmas.
Gina: It's what I do. Every damn year.

Quote from Gina in the episode Yippie Kayak

Jake: I don't know, maybe subconsciously I wanted Amy to smell more like you.
Boyle: Okay, little creepy, bud. Coming on a little strong.
Gina: Wow, the tables have really turned.

Quote from Jake in the episode Yippie Kayak

Jake: Oh my God, it's real life Die Hard. I mean, oh, no, crime.

Quote from Jake in the episode Yippie Kayak

Jake: Charles, did you call this into dispatch?
Boyle: Yes, but I can't get in touch with anyone from the Nine-Nine.
Jake: Right. Amy, Rosa and Holt are having the time of their lives thrashing around in the frozen filthy ocean.

Quote from Sergeant Jeffords in the episode Yippie Kayak

Terry: This better be an emergency. There better be a gun to your head.
Jake: Charles, Gina and I are in a hostage situation.
Terry: Oh, God. I shouldn't have said the gun thing. Terry regrets the way he answered the phone.

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