Devin Cathertaur: I don't even know who you are.
Gina: But I know who you are, Devin. You tell everyone you got a degree from Stanford but you really went to Stamforb, an online college based in Arkansas.
Devin Cathertaur: It's a good school.
Gina: You live with your aunt. That's sad. And you spend a third of your salary on tropical fish and aquaria. [LAUGHTER] You know, I found all this off of, hm, 20 minutes of idle snoopin' around. Imagine what I could do with a dedicated couple of hours.

Gina: Oh! And maybe your co-workers would like to know what happened on your 7th grade field trip to D.C.
Devin Cathertaur: You monster.
Gina: He pooped in the Reflecting Pool.

Sergeant Jeffords: Where were you?
Gina: Uh, just so we're on the same page, how long have you been here, i.e. how elaborate does my lie need to be?
Sergeant Jeffords: An hour.
Gina: Okay. The CIA contacted me, and there's some-

Philip Davidson: I'm Philip Davidson. Detective Jake Peralta asked me to drop by.
Gina: Mm, the dentist who murdered someone. Spoiler alert: they think you did it. [to a cop] Can you show him to Interrogation Room C, please? Have fun in there.
Philip Davidson: Thank you.

Gina: No, you are not, you're the best man for the job. And I think you know what you have to do to get it.
Captain Holt: Believe in myself and give a great presentation?
Gina: Not even close. That's the head of the committee over there, gorging on crab cakes. Just go up to him and sabotage Olivia.
Captain Holt: Um, I don't think I can do that.
Gina: Well, you can't really be the best commissioner the NYPD has ever had if you're not the commissioner.

Captain Olivia Crawford: Hello, Captain Holt.
Captain Holt: Ah, Captain Crawford. To what do I owe the pleasure?
Gina: Captain Crawford is here to see you.
Captain Holt: Thank you, Gina.

Captain Olivia Crawford: I just wanted to thank you, for your brave speech. The mayor's office has replaced the selection committee with a less biased one, so.
Feel free to start calling me commissioner now.
Captain Holt: The only time I plan on calling you is to hear you concede.
Captain Olivia Crawford: It's going to be hard to hear anything once I've crushed you into a fine powder.
Captain Holt: A fine powder that will choke you until you die. May the better candidate win.
Captain Olivia Crawford: She will. [she walks out]
Gina: Captain Crawford left.

Gina: What you looking at? Did the Kanye West cannibalism story finally break?
Rosa: What? Is that a thing?
Gina: Yeah. He eats tiny little bites of people when he hugs them goodbye. I tipped off Page Six, I don't know why they're sitting on it.

Sergeant Jeffords: Bad news, Captain. A water main burst downtown. There's been several injuries.
Captain Holt: Oh, that's unfortunate.
Gina: And the victims are in our blah-blah-blah, but tell him the real tragedy, Terry.
Sergeant Jeffords: Olivia Crawford-
Gina: AKA your main commish competish-
Sergeant Jeffords: Tweeted a statement addressing the water main break, and she's been retweeted by the mayor.

Captain Holt: Anyway, I don't see how this is bad news.
Gina: Because the commissioner race, like all of life, is a popularity contest, and Olivia is sitting at the hot senior table whilst you are eating lunch alone.

Kylie: Yay! Bachelorette adventure!
Gina: Kylie, you should talk less. Sorry, I have to direct it somewhere.
Kylie: Nice to meet you, by the way.

Amy: Look, in my defense, he didn't used to have that man bun. It was just a ponytail.
Gina: I'm just gonna write some of my thoughts down just to let them out, so I don't explode.

Gina: Uh, quick question: If I make fun of Constantine does that count as making fun of you?
Amy: Yes.
Gina: Okay. Can I make fun of you?
Kylie: I'd rather you didn't.
Gina: Well, I have to remove myself from this situation

Amy: Gina, your looks are just as hurtful as your words.
Gina: I'm sorry. I can only control so much. I shouldn't have come back.

Gina: Well, it is officially after midnight, so I can now say whatever I want.
Kylie: Uh-oh.
Gina: Tonight was awesome, and I loved hanging out with your dorks.
Kylie: Aww, yeah. You know, the word "dork" is actually a Celtic word meaning "lungfish".
Gina: Kylie, I'm trying so hard.