Sergeant Jeffords Quotes Page 31 of 34

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Quote from the episode The Golden Child

Sergeant Jeffords: So all this was just to make me mad?
Charles: I need you to feel the anger and resentment that Tyrone McCallister feels every single day of his life.
Sergeant Jeffords: Who's Tyrone McCallister?
Charles: You are. That's the part I wrote for you all along.
Rosa: This is so stupid, Boyle. You can't manipulate somebody like this and then expect them to get on board. Right, Sarge?
Sergeant Jeffords: Sarge? My name's Tyrone. Tyrone McGallagher.
Charles: McCallister.
Sergeant Jeffords: McCallister.

Quote from the episode AC/DC

Sergeant Jeffords: Woah. That is not a pimp walk, that's a limp walk.

Quote from the episode Hostage Situation

Amy: You wrote me a bad recommendation. How could you?
Sergeant Jeffords: Excuse me?
Amy: It's the only explanation! You're mad that I broke your face and I burned your whole body. Well, grow up!
Sergeant Jeffords: Grow up? I have a Roth IRA! I eat wheat toast! You grow up!

Quote from the episode DFW

Sergeant Jeffords: Captain, if you wanted to be healthier, why not come to me? I'm ripped as hell.
Charles: Sarge, health is about flexibility and peace of mind and bone strength, not building vanity muscles.
Sergeant Jeffords: Vanity muscles? I use all of these.
Captain Holt: Really? Even the large neck ones?
Sergeant Jeffords: They help me sleep upright on airplanes!

Quote from the episode Hostage Situation

Sergeant Jeffords: You know what? Here's the letter that I sent.
Amy: "Amy Santiago is one of the finest detectives in my precinct nay, the entire NYPD.
Sergeant Jeffords: Yeah, I even used the word "nay." The idea that you would question my integrity is so - Uh-oh, I got to sneeze. This is gonna hurt!

Quote from the episode DFW

Sergeant Jeffords: Terry can do yoga. Terry is a yoga beast. Watch. Give me a yoga to do.
Charles: Ah, well, we're in warrior pose now, but I suppose for you we can start in child's pose.
Sergeant Jeffords: Terry is not a child! Terry is a warrior.

Quote from the episode White Whale

Sergeant Jeffords: Look, you know Amy better than anyone. You just have to trust your gut.What is your gut telling you?
Jake: That I'm a terrible napkin chooser and will therefore be a horrible spouse.
Sergeant Jeffords: That is not your gut. That is your crazy, nonsense brain.

Quote from the episode Moo Moo

Sergeant Jeffords: I can do more, sir. I'd like to take on additional responsibilities.
Captain Holt: Good. I like seeing you take initiative. Let's see what there is.
One Police Plaza is looking for a City Council liaison. That's a rewarding but challenging opportunity, but I think you'll do a great job.
Sergeant Jeffords: That sounds perfect. Thank you, Captain.
Captain Holt: My pleasure. The application is due tomorrow.
Sergeant Jeffords: Okay.
Captain Holt: It's 96 pages.
Sergeant Jeffords: Okay. Okay.
Captain Holt: Not including a 4,000-word personal essay.
Sergeant Jeffords: Okay. Okay. Okay.
Captain Holt: Will that be a problem?
Sergeant Jeffords: No! Not a problem for Terry. Terry does not have a problem at all.
[cut to Sarge at Amy's desk]
Sergeant Jeffords: Terry's got a big problem!

Quote from the episode A Tale of Two Bandits

Trudy Judy: You should feel these. They're like two baseball bases. Make 'em pop, daddy.
Sergeant Jeffords: Daddy's not sure this is the time.

Quote from the episode Hostage Situation

Sergeant Jeffords: No, I sent the recommendation letter to the wrong place. I thought you were applying to be a mentor, not a mentee.
Amy: You thought I wanted to be a SAM, not a SAM? Are you insane?
Sergeant Jeffords: Well, you should be a SAM.
Amy: No, I should be a SAM.
Sergeant Jeffords: We got to start saying something other than SAM because we are barreling toward a misunderstanding.

Quote from the episode Two Turkeys

Captain Holt: Okay. It was a two-man job.
Sergeant Jeffords: No, I didn't steal your pie either. I lied about the gym because I was still trying to find a Perry the Parrot for Ava. I forgot it was her birthday coming up and by the time I realized, the dumb toy was all sold out. I just didn't want you guys to know what a horrible dad I really am.

Quote from the episode Safe House

Sergeant Jeffords: Bam! Solid match. Okay, I've got three words. I've got an "and", I've got an "an" and a "he". Now, the "he" could be a part of a "the" or the end of "Apache". I don't know why, but I'm getting a strong "Apache" vibe.

Quote from the episode Sicko

Sergeant Jeffords: Hey, Brian. What are you up to?
Brian Floomryde: Typing in numbers into a computer. Like I always do endlessly for 40-60 hours a week.
Sergeant Jeffords: Well, when you love what you do, you don't work a day in your life. Unless, do you not love sad data entry?

Quote from the episode Sicko

Brian Floomryde: Well, my passion is performing. I do musical theater. It's the hardest form of acting.
Sergeant Jeffords: I agree. I am always saying, if you're not singing, you're not acting.

Quote from the episode Sicko

Sergeant Jeffords: You know Brian, this makes me think of something I saw on "Ellen." There was this lady, she wanted to be a cook, but her tongue was all messed up, and she had this friend who didn't even have a tongue I mean, she did, and now they own a taco truck in Lansing.
Brian Floomryde: Huh?
Sergeant Jeffords: Follow your dreams, man. You gotta follow your dreams. Find your taco truck.
Brian Floomryde: Wow. Thank you. That gives me a lot to think about. So what did you come down here for?
Sergeant Jeffords: Oh, uh, I had to borrow the water cooler.

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