Brooklyn Nine-Nine Quote 10390

Quote from Sergeant Jeffords in the episode Chocolate Milk

Sergeant Jeffords: Jake, I have to tell you something.
Jake: Oh, boy.
Sergeant Jeffords: I am a little conflicted about having a vasectomy.
Jake: Really? Is that why you threw an EKG machine at the doctor?
Sergeant Jeffords: I'm sorry I thought of you as a work friend. You're here, man. You're a friend friend. You made Terry get real with himself and his genitals. Your tiny head has a big heart inside it.
Jake: I know that's scientifically wrong, but thanks, sarge.

Sergeant Jeffords Quotes

Quote from the episode Beach House

Sergeant Jeffords: I'm playing Kwazy Cupcakes, I'm hydrated as hell, and I'm listening to Sheryl Crow. I've got my own party going on.

Quote from the episode The Slump

Charles: Hey, Sarge. I need someone to fill out a line up. Will you be scary Terry?
Sergeant Jeffords: Oh, I love being Scary Terry. He says what regular Terry's thinking.
[cut to:
Sergeant Jeffords: This is taking too long! I'm gonna miss the farmer's market!

Quote from the episode The Tagger

Sergeant Jeffords: You should take my minivan.
Rosa: A minivan? Ha ha.
Sergeant Jeffords: You all got a problem with my minivan? Because my wife doesn't like it either. She wanted an SUV, but those things roll, man. They roll!

'Chocolate Milk' Quotes

Quote from Captain Holt

Captain Holt: Captain Wuntch. Good to see you. But if you're here, who's guarding Hades?

Quote from Amy

Amy: Oh my God, she's totally gonna flunk us. I haven't gotten an F since I failed recess in second grade. "Teachers need a break too, Amy".

Quote from Jake

Doctor: We weren't able to do the procedure. Your friend is so large-
Jake: That you needed a bigger saw to cut through his dingus.

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