Brooklyn Nine-Nine Quote 11190

Quote from Jake in the episode Lights Out

Charles: We should walk. It's only 27 blocks, it's gotta be faster than this.
[cut to Dotty tottering with a walker along the sidewalk:]
Charles: I mean, it's a little bit faster.
Jake: Is it? Hey, Dotty, just weighing our options here. Have you ever been worn like a backpack?

Jake Quotes

Quote from the episode AC/DC

Jake: I wasn't hurt that badly. The doctor said all my bleeding was internal. That's where the blood's supposed to be.

Quote from the episode The Party

Amy: I can't wait to see the inside of Raymond's house. I'm gonna learn everything there is to know about him.
Charles: I bet it's really fancy. Like Beauty and the Beast fancy.
Jake: No, it's probably just an empty, white cube with a USB port in it for him to plug his finger in when he's on sleep mode.

Quote from the episode The Vulture

Rosa: Come on, Peralta! Holt said to use the whole team. We all want this solved.
Jake: I appreciate the offer, but I work best alone. Except when it comes to sex. Actually, sometimes including sex.

'Lights Out' Quotes

Quote from Hitchcock

Scully: Guys, stop wasting time. Headlamps on!
Hitchcock: We have to engage in blackout protocol.
Jake: I'm surprised, those guys are really springing into action. Nope, they're just eating all the food in the fridge before it goes bad.
Hitchcock: There's a dozen sandwiches here, I don't know what kind.
Scully: I'll figure it out later. Just start chewing.
Jake: Yeah, they suck.

Quote from Scully

Amy: [groans, gasps] You made me a birthing suite?
Scully: We've been napping at work for 20 years. We know how to create a relaxing space in a police station.
Hitchcock: Gurney.
Scully: Fire blankets.
Hitchcock: Night stick for back massage.
Scully: Soothing lighting.
Hitchcock: AKA Scully's fart candles.
Rosa: I'm sorry I said you were worthless in an emergency. You two really came through.
Scully: It's just nice to have a win after what we went through today. So many deviled eggs were lost, and for what?
Hitchcock: Hey, hey, you can't focus on that. There were hundreds of meatballs that were eaten because of you!
Scully: I could've eaten more. Just one more!
Amy: Guys?
Hitchcock: Not now, Amy.

Quote from Charles

Charles: I can't see anything.
Jake: Me neither. We'll just have to rely on our other senses.
Charles: I call smell.
Jake: Okay, really jumped on that one. I wasn't gonna fight you for smell. I figured we'd just listen for sounds.
Charles: Pfft, good luck with that. [sniffs] Hmm. [sniffs] Yeah. [sniffs] Mm-hmm.
Jake: Okay.
Charles: How's it going over there? You hearing anything?
Jake: Yeah, I'm hearing you and your creepy sniffs.
Charles: Really? Well I'm smelling a lot of jealousy coming from your direction.
Jake: Sound to the left.
Charles: Smell to the left. [crashing sound]
Jake: NYPD, hands up.
Charles: [sniffs] Oh, yeah. We got him!
Jake: Charles.

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