Jake: Okay, awesome. Very inspiring. Now, on to more important things. I have obtained from Rosa a photograph... of Captain Holt's tattoo.
All: Oh.
Jake: I'm sorry, Captain, but there's nothing you can do that will stop me from revealing that your secret and embarrassing tattoo is... a dot?
Amy: Huh?
Captain Holt: It's a decimal point. Ah, what a first-thought mathematical symbol. Might as well have gotten a greater-than or equal-to sign.
Jake: I can't believe I spent $2,000 on a dot.
Amy: You did?
Jake: I know, Amy! We're both upset about the same thing! [chuckles] I got to call Rosa.

Rosa: Come on, Peralta! Holt said to use the whole team. We all want this solved.
Jake: I appreciate the offer, but I work best alone. Except when it comes to sex. Actually, sometimes including sex.

Amy: I can't wait to see the inside of Raymond's house. I'm gonna learn everything there is to know about him.
Charles: I bet it's really fancy. Like Beauty and the Beast fancy.
Jake: No, it's probably just an empty, white cube with a USB port in it for him to plug his finger in when he's on sleep mode.

Jake: I wasn't hurt that badly. The doctor said all my bleeding was internal. That's where the blood's supposed to be.

Captain Holt: The union made it up as a power move. O'Sullivan wants me to issue a statement of public support for the officer, to give them all extra hazard pay and to wear this "Never Forget Burrito" ribbon.
Scully: Weird. It's the exact same color as my Color Blind Awareness ribbon.
Captain Holt: No, it isn't.

Captain Holt: I won't give in to any of their demands. The union is powerful, but I'm sure that most of our uniformed officers understand this incident is nonsense. It is, as Peralta would say, "No big 'whoop.'"
Jake: I appreciate the shout-out, sir, but I actually don't pronounce the H in whoop.
Sergeant Jeffords: Sir, all the uniformed officers just left. They're staging a walkout.
Charles: Well, it seems I was wrong. The "whoop" is big after all.
Jake: It is. Again, though, there's no H in whoop. It's silent.
Captain Holt: "Whoop."
Jake: Whoop.
Captain Holt: "Whoop."
Jake: Am I crazy? How do you say it?
Charles: I say "whoop."
Jake: Okay.

Captain Holt: No, like the famed weapon of the sea, forged by the Cyclops for Poseidon himself. The trident has three prongs, like my approach.
Jake: Ah, not to interrupt, but Aquaman's trident has five prongs.
Captain Holt: That's absurd. The prefix tri means three. What this aquatic-man carries is better termed a "pentadent."
Jake: No, it's a trident. They call it that in the original theatrical release and the Snyder cut. So you're 100% wrong, and everyone's laughing at you.
Captain Holt: Well, regardless, Operation Trident has three prongs. Prong one, Boyle and Peralta.
Jake: Oh, nice, the most important prong.
Charles: Mm-hmm.
Captain Holt: Wrong. Prong two, the center prong, is the most important prong on a trident. It's the longest and straightest and breaks the least often.
Jake: Are you just mad because I questioned you about the Aquaman thing?
Captain Holt: Yes.