Brooklyn Nine-Nine Quote 11425

Quote from Amy in the episode Balancing

Jake: Hey, how'd the presentation go?
Amy: Well, they just called, and... I won.
Jake: What?
Amy: I have authorization to start immediately.
Jake: Wait, you won? That's amazing. Why aren't you more excited? Why aren't you dork-dancing?
Amy: 'Cause you had to miss your thing, and I didn't want to rub it in. So I celebrated in the hallway before I walked in.

 Amy Quotes

Quote from the episode Christmas

Amy: Sir, I'm sure you had your reasons for going to Peralta, but this is exactly the type of job I would love to have.
Captain Holt: Okay, the next time someone threatens to kill me, I'll come straight to you.
Amy: Thank you, sir. I can't wait. I didn't mean- Let's catch this bastard.

Quote from the episode Maximum Security

Captain Holt: This facility is a violent place filled with hardened criminals We need to send someone who can blend in.
Amy: Sir, I would be honored to take on this challenging assignment. [laughter] Why is everyone laughing? I can be a badass.
Gina: You're raising your hand right now.
Amy: We're in a meeting!

Quote from the episode 99

Jake: You might wanna stand back for this, sir. It can get pretty intense.
Amy: [YELLING] All right, you mooks, our union health plan has 100% reimbursement for out-of-state ambulance rides. Scully will fake a medical emergency.
Scully: Don't need to fake it. Always having at least one.
Amy: Great. You call an ambulance and have it take us here to Monroe, Louisiana. The ambulance can drive 25 miles over the posted speed limit, so we'll get there by 9:00 p.m. There's a small airport there, mostly servicing crop dusters. Of course, they can't take passengers, but thanks to a loophole in H.R. 377551, police officers are allowed to commandeer any plane in the interest of national security. The crop duster will land at an airstrip outside of Finksburg, Maryland. We'll take a cab to Baltimore, jump on the 6:48 a.m. train to New York, arriving at 9:26. Kevin will meet us at Penn Station with a fresh Captain's uniform. From there, it's a 29-minute cab ride to One Police Plaza. You change on the way, and we should get to your meeting with five minutes to spare. Stop clapping, you idiots! We gotta move, move, move!
Jake: I love her.

 ‘Balancing’ Quotes

Quote from Jake

Sergeant Jeffords: Listen up, everyone. We had a murder this morning. The vic was found at 8:45 by a dog walker who let herself into his apartment...
Jake: Oh, my God, it's Franzia! This is the work of Johnny Franzia, my white whale. He's finally resurfaced.
Sergeant Jeffords: Not this again.
Jake: Yes, this again. Johnny Franzia has been on a murder spree for the past ten years, and every time he kills someone, he taunts me. Look, there's a deck of cards.
Sergeant Jeffords: You say that whenever there's cards at a crime scene. You know how many people own cards, Jake?
Jake: Then explain this. Johnny Franzia's catchphrase is "deuces are wild." Now look around the apartment. Two chairs, two paintings, two pillows.
Sergeant Jeffords: There are three lamps.
Jake: You think Franzia gives a damn about lamps? You sound so dumb right now. This is why you don't have an arch nemesis, Terry, because you focus on all the wrong details.
Sergeant Jeffords: Maybe I don't have an arch nemesis because I solve all my crimes.
Jake: [silence] That's a pretty [bleep]-up thing to say to me.

Quote from Sergeant Jeffords

Scully: Sure, I'll watch Mac. Don't worry, I've padded all the sharp edges in here.
Jake: Wow. You already baby-proofed it?
Scully: Ah, it's my nap room. You can take a nap anywhere in here. Every surface is like a bed.
Both: Huh.
Jake: Works for us.

Quote from Amy

Sergeant Jeffords: Hey, so don't freak out, but apparently there are several other groups presenting reform proposals to One Police Plaza, and only one will get funding.
Amy: Why would that make me freak out?
Sergeant Jeffords: Because you can be a little competitive.
Amy: [scoffs] That's not true. No one is less competitive than me. No one.

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