Pizza Delivery Guy: Pizza delivery for Jake Peralta.
Jake: Oh, that's me. I didn't order a pizza, though. Someone must know I've been having a hard day.
Pizza Delivery Guy: You've been served.
Jake: What? Come on!
Hitchcock: [on video call] Been there, brother. What did you get served?
Jake: Oh, you. I'm being sued for wrongful arrest.
Hitchcock: No, I don't care about that. I'm talking pizza toppings. The District Court does a great pepperoni.
Jake: You know what? Why are you even talking to me? Scully's taking a nap. What are you doing on there?
Hitchcock: I miss my old role in the Nine-Nine... Hitchcock, the wise sage, always helping people through their troubles.
Jake: That was never your role.

Amy: Hey, I think I found something interesting. I was double-checking last month's surveillance photos, and I noticed this. Hawkins has two different phones: her normal cell, and then this one that only has one app on the home screen Snapchat.
Hitchcock: Oh, she's up to something. Snapchat messages disappear. You can send anything to anybody, and after they see it, it's like I never sent it.
Captain Holt: Nobody ask Hitchcock why he knows that.

Sergeant Jeffords: Hitchcock called himself Scully by accident.
Hitchcock: I did, but it brought me and Scully closer together.

Amy: Hitchcock, why do you have your shirt off?
Hitchcock: Can't spill food on your shirt if you're not wearing one.

Charles: Really never seen Speed, sir? Keanu Reeves, Sandy Bullock, Jeff Daniels at the height of his sexual powers?

Charles: Uh-oh, I know that strut. Little hip swing, playful butt bounce... Somebody made a collar!
Jake: Not loving you talking about my butt bounce, but, also, hell, yeah, someone collared a big dog!
Charles: Woof, woof!

Rosa: So you lost a Speed That sucks. At least you didn't have a Sister Act taken from you.
[flashback:]
Captain Holt: Bracco confessed. The undercover operation is over.
Rosa: But I just got a spot in the choir.
[present:]
Jake: Wait, is that the real reason you left the force?
Rosa: It didn't help.