Captain Holt: Gina, you know I appreciate you, but you have to admit we're not exactly cut from the same cloth.
Gina: Apparently not. I am, of course, exotic silk, where you, sir, are snake skin.

Sergeant Jeffords: And, Gina, you can't run that space heater 24/7 anymore.
Gina: Space heater? Excuse me, this is a Fornax Radiant Comfort System, and her name is Jacinta.
Sergeant Jeffords: Okay, well, Jacinta's gotta go.
Gina: He didn't mean that, darling.
Sergeant Jeffords: Seriously, turn off the space heater.
Gina: No.
Sergeant Jeffords: Do it, now. That's an order.
Gina: Yeah, well, you don't wanna start a battle of the wills with Gina Linetti because you will emerge from that battle a broken man. Not to brag, but I was name-checked in my kindergarten teacher's suicide note.
Sergeant Jeffords: Oh my God.

Gina: It's Gina's phone. Leave me a voice-mail. I won't check it 'cause it's not 1993.

Gina: Is she crying?
Jake: A little.
Gina: You should be wailing you stone-cold bitch. Now call my other grandma.

Jake: "Uh-oh, hope it doesn't get too sexual." Title of your sex tape. But seriously, what is taking so long. Also the title of your sex tape.

Amy: I don't like it. Something stinks.
Hitchcock: Well, I'm sorry, but I refuse to mask my natural musk with a bunch of chemicals.

Gina: You got category I9 C3 G6.
Captain Holt: I9 C3 G6? Is that as good as it sounds?
Gina: You have a robust sense of self and are well suited to leadership positions. Characteristics: strength, determination, tenacity.
Captain Holt: Yes, I suppose that's accurate. They do call me Tenacious Ray down at the country club. Because for the past ten years I've been suing them for discrimination.