Brooklyn Nine-Nine Quote 5304

Quote from Jake in the episode USPIS

Jake: Is this whole war on drugs really worth the human cost of me spending another minute with this behonkus?
Rosa: I don't know what "behonkus" means, but yes.
Jake: "Behonkus" means butt, and I think you could have guessed that from context.

Jake Quotes

Quote from the episode AC/DC

Jake: I wasn't hurt that badly. The doctor said all my bleeding was internal. That's where the blood's supposed to be.

Quote from the episode The Vulture

Rosa: Come on, Peralta! Holt said to use the whole team. We all want this solved.
Jake: I appreciate the offer, but I work best alone. Except when it comes to sex. Actually, sometimes including sex.

Quote from the episode Halloween

Charles: Santiago, I know that you hate Halloween, but stick with me, and I promise you, you will love it.
Amy: Can you magically make everyone kind, sober, and fully dressed?
Jake: "Kind, sober and fully dressed." Good news, everyone. We found the name of Santiago's sex tape!

'USPIS' Quotes

Quote from Charles

Jake: Boyle, why don't you show Danger what a fax machine is.
Charles: Okay. Imagine a letter had unprotected sex with a phone.

Quote from Jake

Jake: Here, my email is-
Jack Danger: Uh, no email. I'll send it to you with r-mail, which is to say, real mail. Because email has put hundreds of my co-workers out of work.
How would you like it if they laid off all of your fellow detectives and partnered you with a robocop?
Jake: I've literally drawn sketches of that.
Charles: The robot has a backpack that can carry me.

Quote from Gina

Captain Holt: Santiago, I may need you to come in for a bit on saturday.
Amy: Again? Are you kidding me, man? (Gasps) I'm sorry. Let's start fresh. Hi!
Sergeant Jeffords: Oh, my God.
Captain Holt: What just happened?
Gina: Her mind finally snapped, like a stale breadstick.

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