Brooklyn Nine-Nine Quote 5739

Quote from Kevin in the episode The Swedes

Captain Holt: Ah, Boyle. Just the man we were looking for. Kevin has accepted a fellowship to teach at the Sorbonne for the next six months.
Charles: Oh, I love Paris. At least how it's represented in the movie Ratatouille.
Kevin: Uh-
Captain Holt: The rodent chef.
Kevin: Ah, yes. Farfetched.

Kevin Quotes

Quote from the episode Safe House

Jake: But going out into public is a huge risk, so maybe let's go over some self-defense techniques. *Kevin punches Jake in the throat* [gasps] [chokes] Usually, you warn somebody before you do that.
Kevin: Raymond told me that the element of surprise was crucial.
Jake: Cool. [coughs] So he's a great teacher. But I will say this. If you're going to do a throat punch, it is key that you say something cool afterwards like, "choke on that".
Kevin: Right, but they're not choking. They're experiencing airway trauma. Ooh, how about, "Better get some corticosteroids to treat that laryngeal fracture".
Jake: Okay, yeah, that's very informative and quite polite. [ahem] But maybe add a "dirtbag" on the end?
Kevin: But a dirtbag is a useful part of a vacuum. I don't see how it's an insult.
Jake: All right, you know, puncher's choice.

Quote from the episode Safe House

Captain Holt: I brought you your box of DVDs.
Jake: Oh, thank you. Oh! Forgot about this one. We never watched "Captain Corelli's Mandolin".
Kevin: What the hell did you just say?
Jake: "Captain Corelli's Mandolin"?
Kevin: Say that to my face.
Jake: "Captain Corelli's Mandolin"?
Kevin: There was a movie about a mandolin, and you kept it from me for two months?
Jake: Well I didn't think it was any good. It's just some period piece.
Kevin: What?
Jake: Set in Greece.
Kevin: Oh, my God.
Jake: Based on some dumb book. *Kevin knocks the DVD out of Jake's hands* Aah!
Kevin: Terribly sorry. It has been a very trying time.

Quote from the episode The Party

Captain Holt: You've been needling poor Peralta so much, you've practically made him a new suit.
Kevin: "Needled him a new suit." Even when we're fighting, you're hilarious. Stop it. Stop it.

'The Swedes' Quotes

Quote from Jake

Jake: My fellow detectives, ours is not an easy job. The hours are long, the danger is constant, the pay is LOL. But today, a glimmer of hope. For today, a new vending machine. Behold him in all of his glory, so full of strength, and promise, and, most importantly, sodium, gluten and fat.

Quote from Gina

Amy: Okay, let's talk planets. Jupiter is a gas giant.
Gina: So's Hitchcock. How does this help me?

Quote from Gina

Gina: You just made Earth lame, and that is my house.

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