Sergeant Jeffords: I'm sick of you, Amy, and Holt winning.
Rosa: You're all so damn smug.
Charles: Yeah, you guys may be champs, but this year this year belongs to The Tramps.
Jake: Charles, that's a bad name.
Charles: Ha, you're just jealous. Everyone loves it.
Rosa: No.
Sergeant Jeffords: Nuh-uh.

Sergeant Jeffords: So we have good news, and we have bad news.
Charles: My Nana always said, "Bad news first because the good news is probably a lie." Fun fact: she made me cry a lot.

Sergeant Jeffords: Boyle! Were you dreaming about Jake again?
Charles: Why did you wake me up?! I told you never to wake me up!

Charles: Is the equipment secure?
Jake: Check.
Charles: Weapon loaded?
Jake: Check.
Charles: Did you have breakfast?
Jake: What? That's not on the checklist.
Charles: I added it because I care about you.
Jake: No, I did not have breakfast.
Charles: Unacceptable. Look in your pocket.
Jake: Hey, there's little chocolate chips in this.
Charles: Yeah, I'm not an idiot. I know how to trick my best friend into eating his fiber.

Jake: Okay, here it goes. Ames, I love you. I love how smart you are. I love how beautiful you are. I love your face, and I love your butt. I should've written this down first.
Amy: No, no, it's okay. Go on.
Jake: I love how much you pretend to like Die Hard.
Amy: I like the second one.
Jake: You don't have to.
Amy: Okay.
Jake: Yeah. You're kind, and you're funny, and you're the best person I know, and the best detective. Also, for reals, I love your butt.
Amy: I love yours too.
Jake: Gross. Amy Santiago will you marry me?
Amy: Jake Peralta, I will marry you.

Jake: Halloween. Mua-ha-ha-ha. It's heist time. Argh!
Amy: Thought you could get a head start on heist prep? Good luck. I'm already dressed.
Jake: Well, I'm also dressed, and I made breakfast. Wait, where are my eggs?
Captain Holt: In my belly. [BOTH SCREAM] Now get a move on, it's heist time.
Jake: I love Halloween!

Jake: [flashback] Mr. Santiago, I'm calling to inform you that I plan to ask your daughter to marry me, but since it's 2017, I am not asking you for your permission, as she is not your property, nor would she be mine, if she chooses to say yes. She's a strong independent woman, and she don't need no man. That being said, I truly hope she says yes. But it's her decision, so just back off!
Amy: Aww, that was perfect. What did he say?
Jake: I have no idea, I left a voicemail. I'm terrified of him.