Amy: Ugh, guys. Gary is killing my productivity. Terry, how did you used to deal with having an Amy?
Sergeant Jeffords: I didn't have to do anything. You've always been great.
Amy: Cut the crap, Terry. I'm drowning.
Sergeant Jeffords: Fine. When you got too difficult to deal with, I'd pull rank.
Amy: Did that work?
Sergeant Jeffords: No. Not even once.
Amy: Oh, my God. I'm so sorry.

Sergeant Jeffords: You should take my minivan.
Rosa: A minivan? Ha ha.
Sergeant Jeffords: You all got a problem with my minivan? Because my wife doesn't like it either. She wanted an SUV, but those things roll, man. They roll!

Sergeant Jeffords: I'm playing Kwazy Cupcakes, I'm hydrated as hell, and I'm listening to Sheryl Crow. I've got my own party going on.

Charles: Hey, Sarge. I need someone to fill out a line up. Will you be scary Terry?
Sergeant Jeffords: Oh, I love being Scary Terry. He says what regular Terry's thinking.
[cut to:
Sergeant Jeffords: This is taking too long! I'm gonna miss the farmer's market!

Jake: Pigeon's still here?
Scully: Yeah. No matter what we do, he just won't leave.
Jake: The problem is you're thinking like detectives.
Scully: No, I'm definitely not.

Charles: Jake, piece of advice: just give up. It's the Boyle way. It's why our family crest is a white flag.

Captain Holt: Are you ready for your first briefing?
Amy: Yes, I am fully prepared. I just wanna establish myself as a leader right away.
Sergeant Jeffords: Just be confident, deliberate and firm. You'll know you have their respect when you can take a moment [pours a cup of coffee] and still keep their attention.
Amy: Amazing.
Rosa: That was captivating as hell.