Adrian Pimento: No, Jake. You don't understand. The universe is sending me a sign. And when the universe talks, I listen!
Jake: Well, I personally don't even really believe in signs, so-
Adrian Pimento: What? Then you deserve to die.

Jake: Well, listen, we need your help.
Adrian Pimento: Great, who are we killing? I won't do kids. That's a rule. But that rule is negotiable if the kid's a dick.
Rosa: No, babe, we don't want you to kill anyone.
Adrian Pimento:What? Really?
Rosa: No.

Adrian Pimento: Uh, I'm scared of heights, Jake.
Jake: Yeah, so am I, Adrian.
Adrian Pimento: This might not be the time to tell you, but both my parents died falling out of lighthouses, separate incidents.
Jake: Oh, man, I have so many questions, but for now, just follow my lead, okay?

Adrian Pimento: No, no, no, I don't mess with computers, okay? Ever since I died of dysentery on the Oregon Trail, I was like, no thank you. I'm done with this.

Amy: Scully and Hitchcock, you're in charge of seating.
Scully: Smart move, Amy. I've been called the Leonardo da Vinci of sitting on my ass.

Charles: And now Nikolaj says he's too frightened to ever sleep again, so that's just superduper.
Adrian Pimento: I don't understand what he's so scared about. If I was there to kill him, he never would've heard me.
Charles: A thing you told him several times.

Rosa: What do you have in there?
Captain Holt: A balloon arch.
Rosa: Oh, my God, Captain. She is magnificent.
Captain Holt: Vindication!