Jake: No, no, no, no, no, no. All is not lost. We can still fix this.
So, sure, maybe you can't get back the backpack, but you could do something even better. Like, what if you single-handedly figure out who Flaco is and then you take him down.
Captain C.J. Jason Stentley: Oh, come on, Jake. I'll just screw it up like I screw up everything else.
Jake: No, you won't, because I will be there to help you, but don't worry, you'll still get all the credit. Listen to me, C.J., we're gonna get you the hell out of here.
Captain C.J. Jason Stentley: Are you sugarcoating this for me?
Jake: I most certainly am not.
Captain C.J. Jason Stentley: Whoo, that's gonna leave a mark.
Jake: Ahh.

Sergeant Jeffords: And, Gina, you can't run that space heater 24/7 anymore.
Gina: Space heater? Excuse me, this is a Fornax Radiant Comfort System, and her name is Jacinta.
Sergeant Jeffords: Okay, well, Jacinta's gotta go.
Gina: He didn't mean that, darling.
Sergeant Jeffords: Seriously, turn off the space heater.
Gina: No.
Sergeant Jeffords: Do it, now. That's an order.
Gina: Yeah, well, you don't wanna start a battle of the wills with Gina Linetti because you will emerge from that battle a broken man. Not to brag, but I was name-checked in my kindergarten teacher's suicide note.
Sergeant Jeffords: Oh my God.

Sergeant Jeffords: Seriously? The heater's under your skirt?
Gina: Maybe. You can't prove that.
Sergeant Jeffords: Yeah, I can. There's a cord running under it, and I think you may be on fire.
Gina: Mm, so?
Sergeant Jeffords: What do you mean "so"?
Gina: I'm not giving up Jacinta.
Sergeant Jeffords: You are on fire, Gina. You do not have the upper hand in this situation.
Gina: I always have the upper hand.
Sergeant Jeffords: Not when there's flames shooting out of your butt!
Gina: Especially when there's flames shooting out of my butt.

Amy: That's why they say "it's test time, so diaper up." They say that, I've never said that. I've never worn a diaper during test. Who would wear a diaper during a test? That's ridiculous, I mean-