Brooklyn Nine-Nine Quote 8786

Quote from Captain Holt in the episode Chasing Amy

Sergeant Jeffords: Check out Jeffords Junction. It's got a ice cream shop, a '50s diner, and a Mexican restaurant with a sombrero on it.
Captain Holt: What happens to the sombrero when it rains? I see no drains.
Does it just fill up with water until the building collapses, killing everyone inside?
Sergeant Jeffords: Fun fact: it never rains at Jeffords Junction.
Captain Holt: So you achieved this level of lushness through irrigation alone?

Captain Holt Quotes

Quote from the episode The Mole

Captain Holt: Nothing's okay. Wuntch, circling me like a shark frenzied by chum. The task force turning into a career-threatening quagmire. An Internal Affairs investigation casting doubt upon my integrity. And you ask, is everything okay? I am buffeted by the winds of my foe's enmity and cast about by the towering waves of cruel fate. Yet I, a Captain, am no longer able to command my vessel, my precinct, from my customary helm, my office. And you ask, is everything okay? I've worked the better part of my years on earth overcoming every prejudice and fighting for the position I hold, and now I feel it being ripped from my grasp, and with it the very essence of what defines me as a man. And you ask, is everything okay?

Quote from the episode Payback

Amy: Maybe we should talk about deets for the case. Plan our next move. Grab some chow.
Captain Holt: No need. I brought these. Nutrition bricks. I have original no flavor, and whole wheat no flavor.

Quote from the episode Tactical Village

Jake: It's the most fun day of the year. Something you wouldn't understand because you're not programmed to feel joy.
Captain Holt: Yes, but my software is due for an exuberance upgrade.

'Chasing Amy' Quotes

Quote from Gina

Jake: I can't believe this is happening. I didn't think there was any way she could fail the practice test.
Rosa: Well, we still have three hours until the exam.
Jake: First we gotta figure out where she is. All right, think. If you were Amy, where would you be right now?
Gina: Oh, uh, boring pantsuit store. A crossword factory? A museum of retainers and headgear? Is it possible to enter the color beige?

Quote from Captain Holt

Sergeant Jeffords: Sir, a witness just came in with her child. While she was being interviewed, I took the kid to the soft room, and the toy situation in there is kind of bleak.
Captain Holt: Is this your opinion or the child's opinion?
Sergeant Jeffords: It's mine.
Captain Holt: Trick question. Any opinion about toys is a child's opinion.

Quote from Gina

Charles: No, that's the Boyle family sourdough starter. It's fed us for 140 years. The bread it births is succulent and firm. Tang for days.
Gina: I hate so many of the words you just used.

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