Quote from Hitchcock in the episode The Tattler
Rosa: Okay. Now open your eyes, and the person you are meant to be with should appear before you.
[Rosa and Charles scream]
Hitchcock: Sorry. I was just watching.
Charles: Get out of here, Hitchcock!
Quote from the episode The Big House Pt. 2
Amy: Hey, I think I found something interesting. I was double-checking last month's surveillance photos, and I noticed this. Hawkins has two different phones: her normal cell, and then this one that only has one app on the home screen Snapchat.
Hitchcock: Oh, she's up to something. Snapchat messages disappear. You can send anything to anybody, and after they see it, it's like I never sent it.
Captain Holt: Nobody ask Hitchcock why he knows that.
Quote from the episode Pontiac Bandit
Sergeant Jeffords: Hitchcock called himself Scully by accident.
Hitchcock: I did, but it brought me and Scully closer together.
Quote from the episode Thanksgiving
Amy: Hitchcock, why do you have your shirt off?
Hitchcock: Can't spill food on your shirt if you're not wearing one.
Quote from Charles
Rosa: Hey. So you know how Alicia and I broke up because she moved to London, then we tried to make it work, but the distance was too much and we broke up again?
Charles: No. The last thing you told me about yourself was that you were bi.
Quote from Captain Holt
Captain Holt: Why is everyone gathered around the radio? Ooh, are they testing the emergency broadcasting system?
Quote from Captain Holt
Captain Holt: Well, this is a total waste of time.
Sergeant Jeffords: Sure, but you can still have fun, even if you're wasting time.
Captain Holt: That's absurd. Productivity is what makes things fun. That's why humans go to work.
Sergeant Jeffords: It is?