Brooklyn Nine-Nine Quote 9332

Quote from Jake in the episode Four Movements

Jake: So what do we say?
Gina: Well, whilst stars hate people, they love animals. 'Cause animals have bad bodies so they're no competition.
Jake: Okay, so we say the party is for monkeys.
Gina: Monkeys with malaria.
Jake: Malnourished malaria monkeys.
Gina: God, it's ridiculous how good we are at this. Let's go in.
Jake: Wait, I don't think there's any way we're getting past those security guards. We need a distraction. Ooh, how about this. I'll sprint past them, and whilst they're chasing after me, you sneak into the VIP.
Gina: Wow, we said "whilst" twice in this conversation.
Jake: I know, this place is really rubbing off on us. [Jake and Gina laugh in a haughty manner]

 Jake Quotes

Quote from the episode The Vulture

Rosa: Come on, Peralta! Holt said to use the whole team. We all want this solved.
Jake: I appreciate the offer, but I work best alone. Except when it comes to sex. Actually, sometimes including sex.

Quote from the episode The Party

Amy: I can't wait to see the inside of Raymond's house. I'm gonna learn everything there is to know about him.
Charles: I bet it's really fancy. Like Beauty and the Beast fancy.
Jake: No, it's probably just an empty, white cube with a USB port in it for him to plug his finger in when he's on sleep mode.

Quote from the episode AC/DC

Jake: I wasn't hurt that badly. The doctor said all my bleeding was internal. That's where the blood's supposed to be.

 ‘Four Movements’ Quotes

Quote from Captain Holt

Gina: Hey, Craptain, you ready to get curb stomped?
Sergeant Jeffords: What?
Gina: At chess.
Captain Holt: We have a weekly match. I'm teaching Gina to play. And she, in turn, is teaching me to trash talk. The hospital called. Your test results came back positive. You're a stage five dumbass.
Gina: Oh! You have come so far.

Quote from Captain Holt

Gina: But I do know the names. I've simply rebranded them. My queen is Rihanna.
My king is Beyonce. And this little guy is Kevin. Would you be willing to murder Kevin, the love of your life?
Captain Holt: Yes. Chess Kevin means nothing to me.

Quote from Gina

Sergeant Jeffords: This is crazy. I can't imagine the Nine-Nine without you.
Gina: Don't worry. I have a parting gift for all of you. I printed "Time for Gina's Opinion" hoodies for you with your names on them. Oh, there you go.
Jake: Oh, that's fun. So like "Time for Jake's Opinion"?
Gina: What are you, insane? No. It says "Time for Gina's Opinion" in large text on the back and then your names are stitched really tiny on the front.
Jake: Ah.
Gina: I had to guess at some of the spellings.
Amy: Arnie?

Submit Quotes