Brooklyn Nine-Nine Quote 9968

Quote from Hitchcock in the episode Ticking Clocks

Scully: What's the problem?
Hitchcock: He wouldn't say.
Scully: Oh, no. Then it must be bad. Call Jake. He'll tell us the truth.
Jake: [answering the phone] Hitchcock?
Hitchcock: Give it to us straight, man. What's going on?
Jake: Uh, just searching the first floor.
Hitchcock: [to Scully] Searching the first floor?
Scully: Why is the lasagna on the first floor?
Hitchcock: [to Jake] Why is the lasagna on the first floor?
Jake: What? Are you talking about? The lasagna is fine.
Hitchcock: Oh, thank God. [to Scully] He says it's fine.
Scully: Oh, you're a saint, Jakey. I love you.
Jake: Okay. Holt's texting me. Love you, too.

 Hitchcock Quotes

Quote from the episode The Big House Pt. 2

Amy: Hey, I think I found something interesting. I was double-checking last month's surveillance photos, and I noticed this. Hawkins has two different phones: her normal cell, and then this one that only has one app on the home screen Snapchat.
Hitchcock: Oh, she's up to something. Snapchat messages disappear. You can send anything to anybody, and after they see it, it's like I never sent it.
Captain Holt: Nobody ask Hitchcock why he knows that.

Quote from the episode Pontiac Bandit

Sergeant Jeffords: Hitchcock called himself Scully by accident.
Hitchcock: I did, but it brought me and Scully closer together.

Quote from the episode Thanksgiving

Amy: Hitchcock, why do you have your shirt off?
Hitchcock: Can't spill food on your shirt if you're not wearing one.

 ‘Ticking Clocks’ Quotes

Quote from Hitchcock

Hitchcock: We cooked that lasagna for nothing. Nothing!
Jake: Okay. But have you ever considered eating lasagna with no garlic bread?
Hitchcock: We've- Never done that before.
Scully: I guess maybe we could give it a try. What do you think, Hitchcock?
Hitchcock: What the hell. I had a feeling something crazy was gonna happen today.
Jake: There you go.
Scully: It's almost ready.
Jake: [microwave dings] Mama Magglione.

Quote from Rosa

Jake: How is she running so fast in those shoes?
Rosa: She's too drunk to feel any pain.
Jake: Open up.
Jenna Pazhley: No.
Rosa: You are trapped in a very small room, and we can see you. What's your plan here?
Jenna Pazhley: Shut up, I'm trying to think. If you come in here, I'll bite you with this weird mouth thing.
Rosa: That is a staple remover, and it's shocking you don't know that.
Jenna Pazhley: Sorry, I'm not a secretary.

Quote from Captain Holt

Sergeant Knox: What's going on? We're running out of time here.
Captain Holt: Uh, sorry, it's uh from my husband, Kevin.
Sergeant Knox: Well, all due respect, but you don't have time for that. You've got 15 seconds before the hacker is inside the server.
Captain Holt: Uh, yes, uh it's just that Kevin just texted me some hot goss about our favorite reality TV star.
Sergeant Knox: 10 seconds. Your agents' lives are at stake. Eight, seven-
Captain Holt: Oh, I understand. I just have to find out about the hot goss.

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