Season 2 Quotes Page 1 of 45

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Quote from Scully in the episode Johnny and Dora

Jake: That machine's been here for ever. It's basically part of the force. Take Scully instead.
Scully: Yes, please. Take me to the land of vending machines.

Quote from Jake in the episode Johnny and Dora

Jake: Let me just start by saying this machine is the best restaurant in Brooklyn. And it always had a table for me.

Quote from Rosa in the episode Johnny and Dora

Rosa: I knew just where to punch it to get free food. Now I'll have to go back to punching Hitchcock.

Quote from Jake in the episode Johnny and Dora

Jake: My C.I. says that tonight Augustine will be handing off the laptop to a buyer from China, a.k.a. the Land of Dragons.
Captain Holt: Make sure that phrase is not in your official report.
Jake: Okay, sorry. The country of dragons.

Quote from Jake in the episode Johnny and Dora

Jake: In the immortal words of Amy Santiago, girlfriend please!

Quote from Amy in the episode Johnny and Dora

Amy: Did I do something to you? Are you mad? Is this because I brushed all the crumbs off your desk?

Quote from Jake in the episode Johnny and Dora

Jake: Okay, the reason I didn't want to work with you is - Should I do this in an accent to undercut some of the awkwardness I'm feeling?

Quote from Jake in the episode Johnny and Dora

Jake: You know when you told me you didn't want to date cops?
(In Jamaican accent) That really bummed me out, man.

Quote from Captain Holt in the episode Johnny and Dora

Captain Holt: Madeline Wuntch is making me head of relations for the NYPD. I'm being forced out of the Nine-Nine. I don't wish to make a big deal of it, so please limit your reactions to one second. Go.
Terry: Why...?
Gina: What...?
Captain Holt: That's plenty.

Quote from Captain Holt in the episode Johnny and Dora

Gina: You can't leave us.
Captain Holt: Madeline's not some invincible succubus. She's a regular succubus and she can be defeated.

Quote from Gina in the episode Johnny and Dora

Gina: Amateur. Always say your insults to someone's face. No paper trail.

Quote from Rosa in the episode Johnny and Dora

Rosa: Anyone over the age of six celebrating a birthday should go to hell.

Quote from Charles in the episode Johnny and Dora

Boyle: I need your help moving this old Ms. Pac-Man machine I bought.
Rosa: Why are you so obsessed with that game?
Boyle: Because it's the sexiest videogame ever. She's insatiable, Rosa. Insatiable. Insatiable-
Rosa: Stop saying insatiable.

Quote from Charles in the episode Johnny and Dora

Charles: If you're going in, I hear this place has an amazing bone marrow custard. *laughs* Not that I've ever tried a bad one.

Quote from Jake in the episode Johnny and Dora

Rosa: Jake, you need a jacket or something.
Boyle: Well, Scully left his sports coat back there. Oh, but it'll never fit Jake's athletic body.
Unless.
Jake: No, I don't want to do that.
Boyle: You have to.
Jake: I'm not going to do it.
Boyle: You're doing it.
Amy: What do you have to do?
Jake: Don Johnson it.

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