Captain Holt: I tried to suck it up and go back to work. I put on my uniform and got in my car. And next thing I knew, I was on a plane to Mexico. I didn't even pack a bag. I bought a bundle of novelty shirts at a nearby gift shop.
This one says, "What's up, beaches?" Instead of "bitches" for humor reasons.
Amy: But you hate humor.
Captain Holt: Well, I'm a joke now, so it suits me.

Scully: Hey, Gina. Did you see "Real Housewives" last night? If she says no, then ask about "Below Deck."
Gina: What are you doing?
Scully: She's getting suspicious, Scully. Act natural.
Gina: Are you wearing an earpiece?
Scully: Tell her no. Scully, stop saying what I'm saying. Be normal.

Amy: He's leaving. Our plan worked.
Jake: We saved our own honeymoon, and fun bonus, we cheered up Holt.
Amy: Yes. Okay, it's time to celebrate. You know what that means. This B needs a C in her A.
Jake: Oh, my God.
Amy: This babe needs a coconut in her arms.
Jake: Oh, I thought you were saying this [bleep] needs a [bleep] in her [bleep].
Amy: Oh, my God.
Jake: Yeah, that was my reaction.