Jake: Fact the first, after years of not caring about my debt, you weirdly want me to pay it back now. That implies to me there is a sudden, unexpected expense.
Sergeant Jeffords: Or I got sick of waiting for you to do the right thing.
Jake: Not plausible. You have endless patience for my shenanigans. Fact the second, you've had dentist appointments twice in the past two weeks. No one goes to the dentist that much. I haven't been in seven years.
Sergeant Jeffords: You should go to the dentist, Jake.
Jake: Probably. My teeth hurt all the time.
Fact the third, I'm really liking this "Fact the" thing, I'm gonna stick with it.