Guard: Can I help you?
Captain Holt: I'm just trying to work up the nerve to see her.
Guard: See who?
Captain Holt: My female wife, Crystal. I was cheating on her with a waitress from Wing Sluts named Jamie-Lynn. One night, when I was philandering, Crystal caught me kissing Jamie-Lynn's heavy breasts. She flew into a rage, and now she's serving five years for aggravated assault.
Guard: Hey, I'm sorry to hear that.
Captain Holt: Yeah, thanks, man. Hey. Bring it in?