Jake: Let's see. Sergeant Jeffords searched "undiscovered muscle".
Sergeant Jeffords: I was working out and I saw a muscle in my shoulder I'd never seen before. I thought it might have been a scientific discovery.

Sergeant Jeffords: You should take my minivan.
Rosa: A minivan? Ha ha.
Sergeant Jeffords: You all got a problem with my minivan? Because my wife doesn't like it either. She wanted an SUV, but those things roll, man. They roll!

Sergeant Jeffords: I'm playing Kwazy Cupcakes, I'm hydrated as hell, and I'm listening to Sheryl Crow. I've got my own party going on.

Charles: Hey, Sarge. I need someone to fill out a line up. Will you be scary Terry?
Sergeant Jeffords: Oh, I love being Scary Terry. He says what regular Terry's thinking.
[cut to:
Sergeant Jeffords: This is taking too long! I'm gonna miss the farmer's market!

Gina: Plus, we already have the perfect candidate already, Savant.
Sergeant Jeffords: That punk who hacked us?
Gina: Precisely. Captain, turn your greatest weakness into your greatest strength. Like Paris Hilton re her sex tape.
Captain Holt: Get to the point.
Gina: Savant tore our walls down, but he can build them back up. Taller and thicker than ever.
Sergeant Jeffords: But how can we be sure he won't turn on us?
Gina: His mom ratted him out, so I bet he'd love a steady pay check to get out of that snitch's house. Oh, if I had a mic right now, I'd drop it.

Cory: It was like taking candy from a baby.
Sergeant Jeffords: Why are you giving candy to a baby in the first place? Don't give candy to a baby! They can't brush their teeth!

Gina: Listen to this. Scully searched for how much fudge is in a calorie.