Sergeant Jeffords: Hey there, Jake. I felt bad about folding your quarter in half, so I got you a new one.
Jake: Thank you. But that's not a quarter.
Sergeant Jeffords: Wow, you're right. That happens to be an 1883 Carson City silver dollar in near-mint condition complete with commemorative case. [whistles] That's gotta be worth $138. You know what? Keep it.