Captain Holt: You move well. Must be all the extra legs, you crab.
Madeline Wuntch: Don't you find this exhausting?
Captain Holt: Thinking of fresh insults? Not at all, you coffin cave mold beetle.
Madeline Wuntch: I meant our relationship. Aren't you tired of the rivalry? We fight and we fight, and nothing changes. But we're really not so different.
Captain Holt: I suppose we were close once. Remember Brighton Beach?
Madeline Wuntch: 1,200 kilos of heroin in an abandoned subway tunnel. How could I forget?
Captain Holt: The largest drug bust in NYPD history pulled off by a most unlikely duo.
Madeline Wuntch: A woman, and a gay, black detective.
Captain Holt: No, I meant a human and a rotted jack-o'-lantern.
Madeline Wuntch: Don't be so hard on yourself. You weren't all the way rotted back then.

Rosa: All you have to do is say a few nice comments during the memorial.
Captain Holt: As God said when Wuntch tried to sneak past the gates into heaven, "It ain't happening, honey." [Rosa cackles]

Amy: Captain, how are you feeling?
Captain Holt: Better today. I even managed to eat some plain toast this morning.
Amy: Smart. Something bland.
Captain Holt: That's my favorite breakfast.

Amy: Maybe we should talk about deets for the case. Plan our next move. Grab some chow.
Captain Holt: No need. I brought these. Nutrition bricks. I have original no flavor, and whole wheat no flavor.

Jake: Hitchcock, can you top it?
Hitchcock: Mine has mother's hospital bed.
Amy: Okay, Scully?
Scully: I got this one red door I've never been able to open and I hear screams behind it sometimes. But it's probably just the wind.
Jake: Okay, that's actually too scary.

Madeline Wuntch: Oh, Raymond, that you came to me to ask for help shows how much you've matured. You know what else shows how much you've matured? Your withered face.
Captain Holt: Now I know why you refer to this as a Suicide Squad, Peralta, because I already want to kill myself.
Madeline Wuntch: Why don't you wait a week? You'll probably die of old age.
Captain Holt: The only way I'm going to die is if you touch me with one of your bony fingers and drag me across the River Styx, you reaper.

Amy: Oh, wait. Before we decide Scully, what's your basement like?
Scully: Bunch of old Victorian wallpaper that came with the house. I tried to peel it off, but the wall underneath was covered with fingernail scratches.
Amy: Ooh.