Amy: Gina, great news.
Gina: Oh no, is Neil deGrasse Tyson here? He will not stop trying to friend me.

Gina: It's Gina's phone. Leave me a voice-mail. I won't check it 'cause it's not 1993.

Gina: Is she crying?
Jake: A little.
Gina: You should be wailing you stone-cold bitch. Now call my other grandma.

Gina: All men are at least 30% attracted to me. My mother cried the day I was born, because she knew she would never be better than me. At any given moment, I'm thinking about one thing: Richard Dreyfuss hunkered over eating dog food. I feel like I'm the Paris of people.

Jake: My fellow detectives, ours is not an easy job. The hours are long, the danger is constant, the pay is LOL. But today, a glimmer of hope. For today, a new vending machine. Behold him in all of his glory, so full of strength, and promise, and, most importantly, sodium, gluten and fat.

Amy: Okay, let's talk planets. Jupiter is a gas giant.
Gina: So's Hitchcock. How does this help me?

Gina: You just made Earth lame, and that is my house.