Quote from Amy in the episode Bachelor/ette Party
Amy: That's not true. I've done stuff. Just say ones that are a little less wild.
Gina: Uh, never have I ever made a turn without signaling.
Amy: Okay, a turn is a big deal. It's not like you said, never have I ever changed lanes without signaling.
Rosa: Never have I ever changed lanes without signaling.
Amy: You guys are insane!
Kylie: Never have I ever accepted the terms and conditions without reading them.
Amy: It's too risky.
Rosa: Left a movie without watching the credits.
Amy: Those people worked hard.
Gina: Used more than the recommended amount of conditioner.
Amy: They make the conditioner. They know what they're doing.
Quote from the episode Christmas
Amy: Sir, I'm sure you had your reasons for going to Peralta, but this is exactly the type of job I would love to have.
Captain Holt: Okay, the next time someone threatens to kill me, I'll come straight to you.
Amy: Thank you, sir. I can't wait. I didn't mean- Let's catch this bastard.
Quote from the episode 99
Jake: You might wanna stand back for this, sir. It can get pretty intense.
Amy: [YELLING] All right, you mooks, our union health plan has 100% reimbursement for out-of-state ambulance rides. Scully will fake a medical emergency.
Scully: Don't need to fake it. Always having at least one.
Amy: Great. You call an ambulance and have it take us here to Monroe, Louisiana. The ambulance can drive 25 miles over the posted speed limit, so we'll get there by 9:00 p.m. There's a small airport there, mostly servicing crop dusters. Of course, they can't take passengers, but thanks to a loophole in H.R. 377551, police officers are allowed to commandeer any plane in the interest of national security. The crop duster will land at an airstrip outside of Finksburg, Maryland. We'll take a cab to Baltimore, jump on the 6:48 a.m. train to New York, arriving at 9:26. Kevin will meet us at Penn Station with a fresh Captain's uniform. From there, it's a 29-minute cab ride to One Police Plaza. You change on the way, and we should get to your meeting with five minutes to spare. Stop clapping, you idiots! We gotta move, move, move!
Jake: I love her.
Quote from the episode Lockdown
Jake: And our second option is surveillance footage of Detective Amy Santiago soliciting drugs using perfect grammar.
Amy: It's not that weird to say, "may I have some cocaine?"
Jake: It is.
Quote from Amy
Amy: I'm so excited for tonight. Thank you to my best friend, Kylie, for organizing this. And thank you for coming, ladies and gentlemen.
Rosa: I still don't get why you guys are here.
Hitchcock: Well, as I understand it, Amy lost some sort of bet with Jake.
Amy: It's true. In hindsight, we should probably stop making major decisions through bets and competitions.
Quote from Captain Holt
Sergeant Jeffords: We've been at this bachelor party for over an hour, wandering around aimlessly and we haven't done one bachelor party thing!
Captain Holt: Well, Terry, if you'd like, I could share a lewd story. Kevin got me quite horny this morning.
Jake: Oh, see?
Quote from Captain Holt
Jake: And gentlemen, welcome to my bachelor party. This is the elite party squad. That is, assuming the captain is ready to let loose?
Captain Holt: Captain? I don't think so. I want you guys to think of me as one of the boys. So tonight I'll be swapping out my captain's hat for my Kangol hat. Call me Raymond.