Quote from Charles in the episode Captain Latvia
Jake: Melvin's import is in Queens. Let's just go there right now.
Charles: Oh, so they could just walk all over me in person instead of on the phone? Face it, Jake, I'm weak.
Jake: What? Don't talk like that. You're very strong, all right? And you're a parent now, which makes you even stronger. I mean, think about all those moms who literally lift buses off their kids every day.
Charles: Oh, so you're saying I should tap into my mommy strength.
Jake: Yeah, or daddy strength, but whatever.
Charles: Right, time to put some daddy into my mommy.
Jake: Gotta be a better way to phrase that, let's go.
Quote from the episode Operation Broken Feather
Sergeant Jeffords: So we have good news, and we have bad news.
Charles: My Nana always said, "Bad news first because the good news is probably a lie." Fun fact: she made me cry a lot.
Quote from the episode The Big House Pt.1
Sergeant Jeffords: Boyle! Were you dreaming about Jake again?
Charles: Why did you wake me up?! I told you never to wake me up!
Quote from the episode Into the Woods
Charles: Is the equipment secure?
Jake: Check.
Charles: Weapon loaded?
Jake: Check.
Charles: Did you have breakfast?
Jake: What? That's not on the checklist.
Charles: I added it because I care about you.
Jake: No, I did not have breakfast.
Charles: Unacceptable. Look in your pocket.
Jake: Hey, there's little chocolate chips in this.
Charles: Yeah, I'm not an idiot. I know how to trick my best friend into eating his fiber.
Quote from Charles
Jake: So, pretty crazy how you took out that Latvian mob guy back there.
Charles: I know, I felt like a superhero, like the Hulk's mom.
Jake: Why the mom?
Quote from Captain Holt
Sergeant Jeffords: I hate that we lose to those pasty-assed mole people every year.
Captain Holt: Oh, there's no point in mincing your words. They're knaves!
Gina: Captain, you kiss Kevin with that mouth?
Captain Holt: You bet I do. And tonight, I'm gonna sing with it. We're taking down the MTA.
Quote from Charles
Charles: Come on, focus, Jake.My boy's happiness is at stake. I mean, read the email Genevieve just sent me. Skip the part about her bra.
Jake: Impossible, it's in all caps, bolded. Oh, here we go: "Nik-Nik is so excited you're getting him Captain Latvia." And then there's a photo of him karate chopping a cat.
Charles: Oh, yeah, that's Captain Latvia's move, the Riga Hammer. You hit a guy here, he goes down instantly.
Jake: Sounds a little far-fetched.
Charles: Okay, well, tell that to Captain Latvia's enemies. Oh, wait, you can't ... because they're unconscious.