Christmas Season 1, Episode 11 - Aired December 3, 2013


When the Captain receives death threats, Jake is put in charge of his personal security. Meanwhile, Amy tries to get the precinct to pose for a Christmas picture, while Sergeant Jeffords faces his final psych eval.

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Guest Stars: Dirk Blocker as Hitchcock, Joel McKinnon Miller as Scully, Jamie Denbo as Hillary, Liz Benoit as Elaine, Mark Berry as Deputy Chief Gerber, Kirk Bovill as Paul Haimes, WIll McLaughlin as Big Santa, Brendan Norman as Young Haimes, Ric Sarabia as Little Santa

Writers: Dan Goor

Director: Jake Syzmanski

Available on Amazon.comAvailable on iTunes

Episode Quotes

Amy: Sir, I'm sure you had your reasons for going to Peralta, but this is exactly the type of job I would love to have.
Captain Holt: Okay, the next time someone threatens to kill me, I'll come straight to you.
Amy: Thank you, sir. I can't wait. I didn't mean- Let's catch this bastard.

Jake: Boyle, frisk the skinny one.
Charles: I've gone 42 years without a lump of coal. I'm not gonna start now.

Jake: Wow, I think I really would have gotten along with young Ray Holt.
Captain Holt: Yes, that's why I decided to change everything about my life.

Jake: Woah, woah, woah. Where are you going, Cold Mountain? I changed your codename.
Captain Holt: To use the restroom.
Jake: I'm only asking this for your safety. Is it a number one or a number two?
Your silence indicates number two.

Captain Holt: I'd like to text my husband to tell him I'll be coming home late tonight.
Jake: Okay, but for security reasons, I get to craft the message.
Let's start with a pleasant greeting. How about, "Hello, honey".
Captain Holt: You will not craft the message.
Jake: Roger that. Honey's wrong. How about "Hello, husband". "Hello, sir"? You call each other sir?


As Jake and Boyle walk down the street, they find two charity Santas fighting. After one of the Santas attacks Jake as he tries to split them up, Boyle kicks the other Santa, who is wielding a knife, in the testicles. Unfortunately, a group of school children are on the scene to see Boyle attack Santa.

When Jake returns to the precinct, he sees Amy at her desk with a present. Amy explains it's one of six presents she got for Captain Holt to thank him for the six lessons he has taught her. At that moment, Captain Holt comes out of his office to make an announcement that he does not want any presents. Captain Holt asks Jake to see him in his office.

As Jake goes merrily into Captain Holt's office, Deputy Chief Gerber informs him that Captain Holt has received a number of death threats. Holt is not worried so he wants to keep it between them. Deputy Chief Gerber states that, hoax or not, protocol dictates than the Captain have a security detail with him at all times, and he chose Jake. Jake is thrilled at the opportunity to be completely in control of Captain Holt's movements.

Boyle goes to Gina to ask for advice about catching a flight to his singles cruise. Gina wonders why Boyle is going on a singles cruise when he likes Rosa. Boyle says he's begun to feel like there's a chance Rosa doesn't love him back. Meanwhile, Amy leads a briefing, asking the squad to help her make a Christmas card for Captain Holt instead of a gift. Terry doesn't have time to help Amy, as his psych eval is today and they're going to decide whether he's ready to be back on the streets.

As Jake watches Captain Holt in his office, Captain Holt gets up to go to the restroom. Jake is making a big deal of his protective duty, pretending to be a Secret Service agent. Elsewhere, Terry sits down with a  psychiatrist for his evaluation. Terry is told to fixate on his fears, specifically his fears for his baby girls and wife if he were to die in the line of duty. Terry squeezes so hard on a pillow that it pops.

Outside the precinct, Jake catches Captain Holt in his car before he drives off. Holt explains he chose Jake because the threat is not real, and he thought Jake would bend the rules and let him do his work. Jake insists that the Captain can not go home, so he offers to take Holt to his mom's house nearby.

Jake and Captain Holt arrive at his mother's house, where Captain Holt quickly realizes it's a safe house. When the Captain ignores Jake's orders to stay, Jake handcuffs Holt to him and throws away the keys. Captain Holt asks for permission to text his husband and say he'll be late home tonight.

Back at the precinct, Gina is helping Amy to photoshop the Christmas card when they realize they don't have a picture of Rosa smiling. When Hitchcock offers to get a picture of Rosa smiling, she hurts him. Meanwhile, Jake lays down the rules for his Safe House, which include watching the film "Safe House". After eating and playing Wii tennis together, there's a knock at the door. Jake opens the door to find Boyle.

When Terry does a word association exercise with the psychiatrist, every word leads to him fearing death. The psychiatrist puts the cover on her stamp to stop the ink drying out. Meanwhile, Boyle explains he's at the safe house because the Captain text him to come uncuff him and take him to his old precinct. Jake realizes the Captain is trying to investigate the threat because it's not a hoax. Boyle doesn't want to come between Jake and Captain Holt, so instead of uncuffing the captain, he cuffs himself to Holt and throws away the key.

Captain Holt, Jake and Boyle investigate the threat against him. When they notice a swimming theme to some of the death threats he received, Holt remembers the case of Colin Haimes, the freestyle killer. Jake wants to go find Haines, but Holt insists on finding him alone. Meanwhile, Gina and Amy continue their fruitless quest to get a smiling picture of Rosa.

Captain Holt, Jake and Boyle drive back to the police precinct, still handcuffed together. Holt doesn't want to endanger the others by involving them in the case. Jake tells the Captain he would usually be saying something like, it's smarter to use the whole team. Captain Holt realizes Jake is right. The squad gather in the briefing room to work on the threat to Captain Holt. After a warrant to trace Haimes' phone comes through, they track him down to the rail yards.

The squad arrive at the rail yards and start searching for Haimes. Rosa tells Boyle she's sorry he missed his flight. When Holt and Jake ring Haimes' phone to draw him out, they move in on his location. Haimes walks up behind Captain Holt and fires his gun. Terry runs in and tackles Haimes to the ground. After Jake radios in with "we got him", Rosa says Charles is down. Boyle was shot in the butt, saving Rosa's life.

At the hospital, the Doctor tells the squad that Boyle will be fine. Terry explains that the shrink didn't exactly clear him for duty. He rushed out and stamped his own paperwork when Gina came to tell him Captain Holt was in danger. When the squad visit Boyle's hospital room, they congratulate him on his bravery. Still, Jake doesn't miss the opportunity to make a few butt jokes. After Rosa makes a joke about Boyle's butt being a hero, she finally smiles. Christmas card complete.