A Tale of Two Bandits Season 6, Episode 5 - Aired February 7, 2019

A Tale of Two Bandits

Terry believes the Pontiac Bandit is stealing cars again, but Jake is convinced his friend wouldn't do that. The rest of the squad fight to keep Shaw's a police bar after some firemen stake their claim to it.

Rate this episode

Guest Stars: Craig Robinson as Doug Judy, Nicole Byer as Trudy Judy, Rob Riggle as Rob Dulubnik, Kevin Dorff as Hank, Adam William Zastrow as Dallas

Writers: Luke Del Tredici

Director: Cortney Carillo

Available on iTunes

Episode Quotes

Charles: We don't want anyone getting alcohol poisoning, so if you throw up, you're disqualified.
Rosa: I never throw up. I just tell my stomach to deal with it. My body is terrified of me.

Rob Dulubnik: Okay, defectives. My guys can handle that.
Amy: Oh, can they? 'Cause the Nine-Nine's about to bring the real heat.
Hitchcock: Get ready for the back draft, bitch.

Sergeant Jeffords: Someone's using his signature move to steal cars, plugging in to the OBD port and reprogramming the immobilizer module.
Jake: That's Doug Judy's MO, but it's not him. He told me he went legit.
Sergeant Jeffords: That's what he told you last time too, before he screwed you over.
Jake: Yeah, but he returned the diamonds to me eventually, and it turned out that was the only way to get Giggle Pig off the streets. Wait, I may be confusing our adventures. What year was the cruise?

Sergeant Jeffords: Dude's a criminal. People don't change.
Jake: Ever heard of Bruce Banner, the Incredible Hulk? You might want to talk to his shirts and pants about people not changing.

Trudy Judy: Carl? Mangy Carl?
Jake: Yes. That is me.
Trudy Judy: I'm Trudy Judy, Doug's sister. This is our aunt Patrice. I'm so glad you could make it. Doug really loved you.
Jake: Oh, he talked about me?
Trudy Judy: Oh, all the time. He was so afraid he'd fall back into your old life. Doug made Mangy Carl an assistant at the architecture firm. He rescued him from a life on the streets.
Jake: Yeah, I was down on my luck, not a penny to my name.
Trudy Judy: You were selling your body for money.
Jake: Did Doug tell you that?
Trudy Judy: He said all your teeth fell out, and your mouth was just a rotten hole.
Jake: 100% accurate.
Trudy Judy: Plus you were sick from those back-alley butt implants.
Jake: Had to have 'em.
Trudy Judy: Carl thought a plumper rump would help him get his [bleep] every night.
Jake: Yeah, I remember having that thought.
Trudy Judy: But the doctor just put a bunch of mulch up there, and it got all infected.
Jake: Dark days.

News Stories

Title Date Posted
605 'A Tale of Two Bandits' Press Release January 23 2019

NBC has released the synopsis for the February 7 episode of Brooklyn Nine-Nine, "A Tale of Two Bandits".  Full story