The Last Day (Part 1) Season 8, Episode 9 - Aired September 16, 2021
After Jake decides to leave the Nine-Nine, he plans one final Heist to give everyone the perfect goodbye.
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Guest Stars: Chelsea Peretti as Gina Linetti, Jason Mantzoukas as Adrian Pimento, Tim Meadows as Caleb, Winston Story as Bill, Dan Goor as Janitor, Jim Meskimen as Deputy Chief Williams, David Piggott as Perp #2, Jeremy Rabb as Perp #3, Chris Renfro as Perp #1, Ryan Salazar as Perp #5, Rafael Torres as Perp #4, Madeline Walter as Tiffany
Writers: Luke Del Tredici, Audrey Goodman
Director: Linda Mendoza
This episode features in the list Halloween Heists.
Episode Quotes
Captain Holt: Wuntch's grave.
Rosa: Wow. Did Terry put up a balloon arch just for the heist?
Captain Holt: No, that was me. I come every week to install a fresh one. But enough chit-chat. Let's dig her up.
Amy: I don't think we wanna do that.
Captain Holt: Why, are you scared of what she'd look like? She's just a corpse with worms for eyes, no different than when she was alive.
Jake: So the heist is actually going to be the perfect goodbye.
Amy: What does that mean?
Jake: Drama, glamor, shocking twists and turns. And the whole heist ends up with everyone at the Brooklyn Bridge.
Amy: Is that meaningful? Have we ever been there together as a squad?
Jake: Uh, yeah.
[theme music plays over clip from opening credits]
Jake: I'm not sure why we all looked so intense, we were just getting falafel.
Amy: I mean, that falafel stand is really good.
Jake: True that, yeah.
Sergeant Jeffords: [on alarm app] Terry loves waking up. Terry loves waking up. Terry...
Sergeant Jeffords: Good morning, honey, time to... [screams] What the hell are you doing?
Jake: It's Holt and Amy's last day, so we're having a final heist! It's heist day!
Sergeant Jeffords: Couldn't you have just sent an email?
Jake: Nope, this was the only way. I have to go alert the others. See you soon!
[later, as Rosa opens her refrigerator:]
Jake: It's heist day, Rosa! [Rosa screams] Whoops, sorry about your milk. Gotta go!
[later, as Charles goes to wake Nikolaj up:]
Charles: Niko, it's time for school.
Jake: It's heist day, Charles!
Charles: Where's Nikolaj?
Jake: He's crying in the closet! Gotta go!
[later, as Amy walks into their bathroom:]
Amy: Babe, what are you doing?
Jake: I was hiding so I could surprise you. But if you're here, then who's in our shower?
Captain Holt: It's me, Captain Holt. It's heist day, Jake.
All: Oh!
Scully: Found it. Here.
Charles: "Don't tell me where the next clue is hidden, tell me why."
Amy: "Tell me why." From that time Jake made the perp sing that song.
Jake: Wait a minute, you guys know about that? Were any of you actually there?
Rosa: You've told us the story many times.
Captain Holt: And tried to recreate the moment on several occasions.
[flashback:]
All: ♪ Working at the car wash ♪
Jake: No, number two and five, you're off key. Number three, you're coming in way too early. I mean, what are we even doing here, guys? [to the witness] So which one do you think killed your family?
[present:]
Jake: Yeah, I got to stop trying to recapture the magic of the original and move on. Anyways, back to the eighth annual heist.
[flashback:]
Jake: Anyways, once everyone arrives there's gonna be a huge fireworks display.
Amy: Uh-uh, no. Remember when you almost blew off your thumb with that M-80? No fireworks.
Jake: Okay, fine! But luckily I have a surprise guest lined up. I reached out to Bruce Willis's people and they said that he would, quote, "Not engage with something like that." So, I think it's gonna work out.