Jake: Okay, this is very scary, but it's okay, because you're a trained pilot.
Adrian Pimento: No, I'm not. I'm self-taught.
Jake: What?
Adrian Pimento: Oh, yeah. You can learn anything online. Ooh, you should see me do origami.
Gina: Oh, do you know how to do a frog?
Adrian Pimento: Oh, no!
Gina: Can you do a swan?
Adrian Pimento: No.
Gina: Can you do a crane?
Adrian Pimento: What's a crane?
Gina: Okay, he does not know how to fly a plane.

Gina: It's Gina's phone. Leave me a voice-mail. I won't check it 'cause it's not 1993.

Gina: Is she crying?
Jake: A little.
Gina: You should be wailing you stone-cold bitch. Now call my other grandma.

Gina: All men are at least 30% attracted to me. My mother cried the day I was born, because she knew she would never be better than me. At any given moment, I'm thinking about one thing: Richard Dreyfuss hunkered over eating dog food. I feel like I'm the Paris of people.

Amy: Scully and Hitchcock, you're in charge of seating.
Scully: Smart move, Amy. I've been called the Leonardo da Vinci of sitting on my ass.

Charles: And now Nikolaj says he's too frightened to ever sleep again, so that's just superduper.
Adrian Pimento: I don't understand what he's so scared about. If I was there to kill him, he never would've heard me.
Charles: A thing you told him several times.

Captain Holt: Right, Santiago?
Amy: The arch sucks! I'm sorry. I didn't want to say anything because you're my boss and you were so excited, but the truth is every time I look at it I wanna die and take you with me.
Captain Holt: Well, I wish you'd said something before I spent all day making it. Of course, you didn't want to "burst my bubble". Pun intended. And then you did. [starts popping balloons]