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Quotes from ‘Suicide Squad’

Suicide Squad

Suicide Squad
Season 6, Episode 18 - Aired May 16, 2019

Desperate circumstances call for desperate measures, as Jake, Holt, Amy, Terry, Rosa and Charles must ally themselves with old enemies.

Quote from Scully

Jake: Hitchcock, can you top it?
Hitchcock: Mine has mother's hospital bed.
Amy: Okay, Scully?
Scully: I got this one red door I've never been able to open and I hear screams behind it sometimes. But it's probably just the wind.
Jake: Okay, that's actually too scary.

Quote from Captain Holt

Madeline Wuntch: Oh, Raymond, that you came to me to ask for help shows how much you've matured. You know what else shows how much you've matured? Your withered face.
Captain Holt: Now I know why you refer to this as a Suicide Squad, Peralta, because I already want to kill myself.
Madeline Wuntch: Why don't you wait a week? You'll probably die of old age.
Captain Holt: The only way I'm going to die is if you touch me with one of your bony fingers and drag me across the River Styx, you reaper.

Quote from Scully

Amy: Oh, wait. Before we decide Scully, what's your basement like?
Scully: Bunch of old Victorian wallpaper that came with the house. I tried to peel it off, but the wall underneath was covered with fingernail scratches.
Amy: Ooh.

Quote from Madeline Wuntch

Madeline Wuntch: What the hell, Raymond? You were following me?
Captain Holt: I don't know what you're talking about. I've been here the whole time.
Madeline Wuntch: My mistake. These two goons were carrying a dirty old mop that looked exactly like you.

Quote from Captain Holt

Jake: The point is, without any good leads, Kelly will give the order to use the stingray an order that we will record thanks to our very own Madeline Wuntch.
Madeline Wuntch: Not possible. Kelly won't tell me anything. He won't even meet with me.
Captain Holt: Perhaps you can sneak in disguised as an old leather chair.

Quote from Captain Holt

Jake: Look, if you wanna stop Kelly, she's the key to my entire plan. So, either you get over it, or we walk away from this thing right now.
Captain Holt: Ugh, fine. I will learn to trust Madeline Wuntch.
[cut to:]
Captain Holt: I will never trust Madeline Wuntch. She's a venomous snake waiting to strike, and you know what we do to snakes.
Rosa: Chop their heads off. Remove the skin. Turn them into boots.
Captain Holt: Don't be absurd. Who would want Trollskin boots?
Rosa: You just said she was a snake.
Captain Holt: The devil comes in many forms.

Quote from Captain Holt

Jake: Okay, I smoothed things over with Madeline, and she's agreed to rejoin the Suicide Squad.
Captain Holt: Oh, goody gumdrops. But do we even need her? What does she bring to the table?
Madeline Wuntch: 30 years of police experience.
Captain Holt: I have 33.
Madeline Wuntch: I earned a Police Combat Cross.
Captain Holt: I have a Medal of Honor.
Madeline Wuntch: I own the record for most arrests as a uniformed officer in NYPD history.
Captain Holt: You got me there of course, I never spent much time in uniform because I was promoted to detective after one month.
Madeline Wuntch: They're not allowed to do that. It's against the rules.
Captain Holt: It's also against the rules to let a pile of worms wear a uniform, and yet here you stand.

Quote from Captain Holt

Captain Holt: Fine, but on two conditions we stay at least 4 inches apart at all times, and you tuck your tail back into your pants so I don't trip on it.
Madeline Wuntch: Deal.

Quote from Charles

Jake: Actually, scratch that. We're not gonna use ski masks. We'll use cool rubber masks.
Charles: Ooh, we should be the ladies of "The First Wives Club." I call Keaton.
Jake: We're not gonna do "First Wives Club" masks.
Charles: Just because you can't be Keaton? Grow up, Jake!
Jake: No, because they don't exist. And also, yeah, Keaton is clearly the coolest one and I don't think it's really fair that you just "called her."

Quote from Captain Holt

Captain Holt: And what do you hope to get out of this, Madeline? Let me guess, revenge on Dorothy... for killing your sister?

Quote from Captain C.J. Jason Stentley

Captain C.J. Jason Stentley: My name is Captain Jason Stentley. It's Friday night I think. There's no windows in here. This morning, I was kidnapped for real-
Jake: Stop.
Captain C.J. Jason Stentley: What? What was wrong with that?
Jake: You said you were kidnapped "for real."
Captain C.J. Jason Stentley: Well, I don't want people to think I was fake kidnapped. You know? I'm selling it.
Jake: Okay, let's just do it again. Say you were kidnapped and nothing else.
Amy: Now he's gonna add "nothing else."
Captain C.J. Jason Stentley: She's right.
Jake: Okay, fine, one more time. Take 12. Just say kidnapped.
Captain C.J. Jason Stentley: Okay. Kidnapped.

Quote from Madeline Wuntch

Captain Holt: How do we get close enough without attracting attention?
Madeline Wuntch: Could dance. You must know some moves. You were mentioned by name in the "Monster Mash."

Quote from Charles

Jake: Now, Kelly's stingrays can steal cell phone data from anyone, including us, so I procured special equipment for us to communicate with.
Amy: Extremely old beepers?
Jake: Yeah, they're analog, so the stingrays can't detect them.
Charles: I had one of these in high school, and it was so cool. I used to sit in math class, and you feel that buzz, and it's your dad saying he loves you. The rest of the day, you're just walking on air.

Quote from Hitchcock

Jake: So we'll make a hostage video, but I don't think we should do it here. It's too nice. Do we know anyone with, like, a real creepy basement?
[cut to:]
Hitchcock: Yeah, it's just got one exposed light bulb and a couple of spent mattresses.
Jake: "Spent"? Oh, yeah. That sounds perfect.

Quote from Captain Holt

Madeline Wuntch: Apology accepted. There's a Policeman's Ball tonight. I can plant the bug on Kelly there. And since you don't trust me, you can be my plus one.
Captain Holt: Oh, please. Everyone knows we're enemies. It would raise suspicions.
Madeline Wuntch: Don't worry. I know just what to tell people.
[cut to:]
Captain Holt: Madeline and I are now ... lovers.

Quote from Captain Holt

Captain Holt: You move well. Must be all the extra legs, you crab.
Madeline Wuntch: Don't you find this exhausting?
Captain Holt: Thinking of fresh insults? Not at all, you coffin cave mold beetle.
Madeline Wuntch: I meant our relationship. Aren't you tired of the rivalry? We fight and we fight, and nothing changes. But we're really not so different.
Captain Holt: I suppose we were close once. Remember Brighton Beach?
Madeline Wuntch: 1,200 kilos of heroin in an abandoned subway tunnel. How could I forget?
Captain Holt: The largest drug bust in NYPD history pulled off by a most unlikely duo.
Madeline Wuntch: A woman, and a gay, black detective.
Captain Holt: No, I meant a human and a rotted jack-o'-lantern.
Madeline Wuntch: Don't be so hard on yourself. You weren't all the way rotted back then.

Quote from Captain Holt

Madeline Wuntch: There's John Kelly. Twirl me into him, and I'll place the bug. Hello, John.
John Kelly: Right on time, Madeline. Did Raymond buy it? Did he think you were bonding?
Madeline Wuntch: He was smiling at me like an idiot.
Captain Holt: You've betrayed us, you coffin cave mold beetle!

Quote from Captain C.J. Jason Stentley

Captain C.J. Jason Stentley: Oh, man. I can't believe this wild ride's over. We've changed so much. You know, when we started out, we were just Charles the jock, Amy the rebel, Captain Silly Pants, Talky-talky Rosa, Terry the stoner, and C.J. the ringleader.
Amy: I'm not sure you're nailing these.

Quote from Captain Holt

Madeline Wuntch: You don't trust me, I don't trust you. The mission is off.
Here's your bug back. It's not an actual bug, so don't eat it, you lizard.
Captain Holt: Ha! You didn't specify the subspecies of lizard. I won that round!

Quote from Charles

Charles: Did you guys just kiss?
Jake & Amy: Hm?
Charles: Did I miss it?
Captain Holt: Yes. It was very unprofessional.
Charles: Oh, come on!

Quote from Captain Holt

Captain Holt: I don't like this. I wouldn't wish working with Madeline Wuntch on my worst enemy, and my worst enemy is Madeline Wuntch, whom I hate.

Quote from Charles

Charles: Oh, I love seeing these glimpses of domestic Peraltiago. Now kiss.
Jake: No.
Charles: You don't do it enough.
Jake: We do it all the time, just not in front of you.
Charles: It's been a year!

Quote from Jake

Captain Holt: When did you hatch this plan?
Madeline Wuntch: Peralta thought of it when I tried to quit the mission.
Jake: Hey, what's Holt's expression right now? Would you describe it as, proud daddy?
Madeline Wuntch: It's hard to tell. He's still piecing it together. This could take a while.
Captain Holt: Why didn't you just tell me what was actually happening?
Jake: I wanted to, sir, but it involved trusting Madeline Wuntch, and I just didn't think you could handle it. But I'm sorry that I lied to you. Sir? Sir? Oh, no. Is he mad? I can't see anything. Did he storm out?
Captain Holt: No, I stormed in! To tell you it was a great plan. Nice work, Peralta.
Jake: And there it is the proud daddy.

Quote from Sergeant Jeffords

Sergeant Jeffords: Count me in. I got nothing else going on.
Rosa: Aren't you supposed to be getting ready to transfer to Staten Island?
Sergeant Jeffords: Eh, that's not real.
Rosa: It was pretty real last week.
Sergeant Jeffords: That's before I decided to pretend it wasn't. I'm in denial.
Rosa: Most people who are in denial don't usually say they're in denial.
Sergeant Jeffords: That's because they're in denial about being in denial. But I'm not in denial. I'm in denial.
Captain Holt: Is Jeffords' brain okay for this mission?
Sergeant Jeffords: Yes, sir for this and all future Nine-Nine missions, which I'll definitely be a part of.

Quote from The Vulture

Jake: So, this apartment will be our base for the duration of the mission. Thank you to The Vulture for procuring it.
The Vulture: Hey, don't thank me. Thank my boy, Billy. He said the place was mine while he's still in prison.
Jake: What?
The Vulture: That's not what it sounds like. His only crime was planning a kickass music festival.
Jake: Are you friends with the Fyre Festival guy?
The Vulture: Best friends. He got a bum rap. You can learn about it when my documentary comes out. It points all the blame where it clearly belongs with the island people.
Jake: Wow, so many levels of terrible there.

Quote from Madeline Wuntch

John Kelly: Oh, come on, Madeline. There's no need to gloat. Though, it does feel good. Gloaty, gloat, gloat.
Captain Holt: I knew I never should have trusted you.
Madeline Wuntch: Yes, obviously not, you dum-dum. John, you're gonna wanna remember this. Why don't you snap a photo of him?
John Kelly: Oh, yeah. Yeah.
Madeline Wuntch: Why don't you get in there with him?
John Kelly: Oh, why the heck not? My kids just got me a digital picture frame.
Madeline Wuntch: All right, everybody say, "Nine-Nine."
John Kelly: Nine-Nine.
Madeline Wuntch: Mm. Raymond, I love the scowl, but could you slump your shoulders a bit more? Remember you're a man who just lost everything.

Quote from Madeline Wuntch

Jake: And this is rock bottom.
[On the other side of the two-way mirror:]
Madeline Wuntch: Oh, Raymond. This is sad. He's the one you think of like a son, right? Or are you closer to Santiago? Not that it matters. They're both equally going to prison.

Quote from The Vulture

Jake: They have my hair? I thought you put your two worst guys on this.
The Vulture: These are my worst guys, all right? They're real dorks. They both wear glasses. And one of them's even a woman.
Jake: Ugh. You said you didn't trust them to get coffee.
The Vulture: Look, if you can't tell what "coffee" is code for by now, then you and I shouldn't be talking about this, Jake.
Amy: Oh, my God. He put his best detectives on the case.
The Vulture: Hey, my two best detectives are Sticky and Boner, and they definitely know how to order "coffee." Extra cream. Wink, wink.

Quote from Jake

Madeline Wuntch: The only way to get you to trust me is if you thought I was betraying Holt.
Jake: Yeah!
Madeline Wuntch: And now I have access to all your personal correspondence-
Jake: All right!
Madeline Wuntch: Including all stingray authorizations. It's over, Kelly. You're done.
John Kelly: Okay. You may have won this round, Madeline, but you're gonna live to regret it. You are both so gonna live to regret it.
Jake: I agree with what was just said.
Madeline Wuntch: Hey, Jake? I'm just gonna hold this down.
Jake: Yeah, sounds good.

Quote from Captain C.J. Jason Stentley

Jake: We're gonna kidnap a cop. But not just any cop it needs to be someone so high-ranking that it sends shockwaves through the system, but not important enough that their absence negatively impacts the NYPD in any way.
Captain C.J. Jason Stentley: Who you guys thinking?
Amy: We're clearly all looking at you.
Captain C.J. Jason Stentley: Oh, God. Am I in charge of the meeting? Dismissed. Dismissed.

Quote from Captain Holt

Jake: Look, sir, I've explained this. Wuntch is the only one that can get close to Kelly. We need her.
Captain Holt: Okay. The worm pile stays.

Quote from Captain Holt

Captain Holt: Well, well, well. Commissioner.
Madeline Wuntch: Still not used to hearing that. Of course, I'm only acting commissioner until they choose someone permanent.
Captain Holt: Might well be you. After all, you brought down John Kelly. Wonder what he's doing now.
Madeline Wuntch: He's got a much higher-paying job in the private sector.
Captain Holt: Yes, the world is horrible.

Quote from Captain Holt

Captain Holt: Nobody's going to Staten Island.
Sergeant Jeffords: Okay, damn, I get it. I'll come to you.
Captain Holt: No, you're staying here at the Nine-Nine. I just talked to Madeline Wuntch. She's making a personnel change, which frees up some room in the budget.
Sergeant Jeffords: Really?
Rosa: What kind of personnel change?
Captain Holt: I told her that I'd only spent a month as a patrolman before I made detective. She said that's against regulations and has decided to rectify the situation.
Jake: Rectify it how?
[cut to Captain Holt signalling traffic in the middle of a busy intersection]

Quote from Charles

Sergeant Jeffords: Could I have everyone's attention? I know it's my last day, and I've been in denial about it all week. And I still am. So, I'm giving this toast for no reason. Here's to nothing!
Jake: You okay there, Ter?
Sergeant Jeffords: It's just that, if I wasn't in denial, I would be so depressed right now at the thought of leaving all of you.
Rosa: Yeah, we'd be depressed too if anything was happening, which it isn't.
Amy: Right, and I'm not gonna say that no matter what precinct number is on your uniform, you will always be part of the Nine-Nine.
Sergeant Jeffords: It means so much to me you aren't saying that right now.
Charles: And I wanna say I'm not gonna miss you at all, you piece of crap. Good riddance.
Jake: Pretty sure you're misreading the game here, Charles.
Charles: Yeah. I see that now.

Quote from Captain C.J. Jason Stentley

Jake: Okay, one more take. Please stop saying, "Don't forget to like and subscribe."
Captain C.J. Jason Stentley: Sure, but how we gonna get followers on this thing then?

Quote from Hitchcock

Amy: Does anyone have a good lawyer?
Hitchcock: I got a divorce guy, an alimony guy, a slip and fall guy, a pizza's too hot guy.

Quote from Jake

Jake: But he does have a point. Nothing bad is gonna happen to us.
The Vulture: Wrong! You turds are about to get flushed. Come on, Peralta. You're up first. Let's go.
Jake: Oh, cool. So, I'm the first turd to be flushed. Bye, you guys.

Quote from The Vulture

Jake: What are you doing? You were gonna get promoted out of Missing Persons.
The Vulture: Your plan went to hell, tough guy. Wuntch she came to me with a much better one. Guess what she's giving me for betraying you? My dream job captain of the-
Jake: 69th precinct.
The Vulture: Bingo.

Quote from Jake

Madeline Wuntch: [taking the photo] And done. We got it, Peralta.
Jake: Boom! Are they totally shocked? Is Kelly like, what just happened?
John Kelly: What just happened?
Madeline Wuntch: You've been had, John. You see, when you handed me your own locked phone just now to snap that photo, I cloned it to a secure network server.
Jake: When you handed Wuntch your locked phone-
Madeline Wuntch: Yeah, yeah. I already said that part.
Jake: Sorry. I can't see or hear anything. I'll just be quiet from now on. I might chime in with a, "Yeah!" here and there to stay in the mix.
Madeline Wuntch: Great.

Quote from Charles

Charles: I have an idea. So when my dad lost his flower shop, my Aunt Bruce-
Jake: Charles, we don't have time for a weird Boyle story right now. Just tell us your idea.
Charles: We make a scary hostage video where it looks like we're gonna kill C.J.
Jake: Ooh, I love that. Wait a minute. Your dad did that to save his flower shop? Was your aunt the hostage? What happened?
Charles: You said we didn't have time.
Jake: I didn't know it was the coolest story ever.
Charles: Oh, it is.
Jake: Well then, tell the whole thing and spare no detail.
Charles: Okay, so you know how Aunt Bruce can lactate on command?
Jake: Of course.
Amy: Guys.

Quote from Captain C.J. Jason Stentley

Jake: When C.J. goes to get his morning coffee, we will arrive and grab him. He will pretend to struggle just enough to attract attention.
[fantasy:]
Captain C.J. Jason Stentley: Help! Help!
[reality:]
Captain C.J. Jason Stentley: I'm gonna write this down so I remember my lines.
Jake: I can see that you already have the word "milk" written on your hand. I know where this is going.
[fantasy:]
Captain C.J. Jason Stentley: Milk! Milk!
[reality:]
Jake: Don't do that.

Quote from Jake

Jake: Let's bring it in, huh? "Suicide Squad" on three. Ready? One, two-
The Vulture: I don't touch other dudes' hands.
Charles: Whose hand is sticky?
Captain C.J. Jason Stentley: It might be me. I ate a popsicle earlier.
Captain Holt: It's probably Madeline. Cockroaches release a mucus-like secretion.
Madeline Wuntch: You would know about roaches, you roach.
Jake: And three! Suicide Squad!

Quote from Captain Holt

Jake: Will you calm down? She works at One Police Plaza. All you have to do is run into him.
[fantasy:]
Madeline Wuntch: Commissioner Kelly.
John Kelly: Oh, Madeline. I didn't see you there. I thought you were an old leather chair.
[reality:]
Jake: He's not gonna say that.
Captain Holt: He might.

Quote from Captain C.J. Jason Stentley

Jake: And that's the plan. That is exactly how tomorrow's gonna go.
Captain C.J. Jason Stentley: Got it. So you do or you don't want me to yell "milk"?

Quote from Captain C.J. Jason Stentley

Captain C.J. Jason Stentley: Leave me alone! Leave me alone!
Jake: What the [bleep]?
Captain C.J. Jason Stentley: You'll never get me alive! Help! Help! Somebody call the police! Here, take her. Take her instead of me. No, don't hurt me.
Don't hurt me. Oh, it's you.
Jake: Yeah, it's us. Now, get in the van.
Captain C.J. Jason Stentley: Oh, okay. Help!

Quote from Captain C.J. Jason Stentley

Captain C.J. Jason Stentley: Hey, could we stop and get a Slushee? It's just that you guys kinda made me drop it back there.
Amy: What the hell was that, C.J.?
Captain C.J. Jason Stentley: I'm sorry! I didn't know it was you. You were supposed to be in gorilla masks.
Jake: Okay, so, let me get this straight. You thought that we were real kidnappers who showed up at the exact time that we planned a fake kidnapping?
Captain C.J. Jason Stentley: Exactly. You get it. He gets it.

Quote from Jake

The Vulture: You know what, Peralta? This is all your fault. A witness saw your face and now there's a police sketch of you being sent around.
Jake: Oh, please. That doesn't even look like me. The only thing that got right is my little curl, and I can just get rid of that.
Charles: Jake, you can't.
Jake: You're right. It's worth the risk to keep it.

Quote from Captain C.J. Jason Stentley

Captain C.J. Jason Stentley: Guys, stop fighting. We did it. Let's just chill and play some "Madden."

Quote from Jake

Amy: Sorry. Sorry I'm late.
Captain Holt: Why is Santiago here? We agreed to keep this secret.
Jake: Well, it's hard to keep secrets when you're married to an ace detective.
Amy: He told me as soon as he got home.
Jake: I did. I'm so excited about the Suicide Squad.

Quote from Jake

Jake: Terry, come on. We're still gonna see you all the time. I promise.
Sergeant Jeffords: You'll come visit me in Staten Island?
Jake: Yeah! Or, you know, you can come to Brooklyn. There's seven of us, one of you, but we can iron out the details later.

Quote from Jake

Charles: I thought we were getting rubber masks.
Jake: Yeah, I couldn't find any. It's not Halloween.
Amy: These look like they're from "Fifty Shades of Grey."
Jake: Yeah, I got them from a sex shop, Amy, and we're lucky to have them. There were only three left.
Captain Holt: At least you're not wearing a gimp mask.
Jake: Look, there weren't a lot of options. It was a very awkward retail interaction.

Quote from The Vulture

Jake: All right, this is pointless. C.J. will just tell everyone the truth.
The Vulture: No, he won't. I bought him off. All I gotta do is play "Madden" with him.
Jake: Come on, C.J.

Quote from The Vulture

Jake: Look, you're not gonna get away with this. You were a part of the whole thing.
The Vulture: First of all, Jake, there's no records that you and I teamed up together because you insisted that we only communicate through a beeper.
Jake: Stupid beepers. We're right to be addicted to our phones.
The Vulture: Eyewitness saw you. The DNA's all over the scene. And I caught you red-handed making a hostage video. Your [bleep] is cooked.
Jake: That's not a saying. It's "goose."
The Vulture: Who cares about a goose? I'm talking about cooking a penis.

Quote from Jake

Captain C.J. Jason Stentley: You know, I actually wouldn't mind getting rid of John Kelly either. That guy makes up so many dumb rules. He told me I couldn't eat raw chicken.
Charles: And you think a new commissioner will-
Jake: Yeah, he's already on board, so yes, a new commissioner would let you eat raw chicken for whatever reason.
Captain C.J. Jason Stentley: It's healthier.
Jake: It sure is, Ceej.

Quote from Sergeant Jeffords

Sergeant Jeffords: Everybody just relax. We're not gonna go to prison. It's all gonna work out in the end. Should we play Celebrity?
Rosa: Come on, man.
Jake: Yeah, come on, Terry. No one wants to play Celebrity, the best game ever made.

Quote from Sergeant Jeffords

Sergeant Jeffords: She's still standing there.
Rosa: Oh, since we got time, you wanna talk about your good-bye party? Will you eat a cake, or does it have to be boneless chicken breast?
Sergeant Jeffords: Sure. 70-year-old Terry can eat whatever he wants. You are talking about my retirement party, right? 20 years from now.
Rosa: Dude, you know I'm not talking about that. What do you think is gonna happen at the end of the week?
Sergeant Jeffords: I don't know, but I do know what's gonna happen right now. Topic change. You ever wonder where wind starts? I have. Wind is crazy.
Rosa: You need to face facts.
Sergeant Jeffords: About wind? I'm trying, but you won't engage. Why you in denial about wind, Rosa?

Quote from Charles

Charles: I can't go to prison. I couldn't even get through the scary parts of the musical, "Chicago."

Quote from Sergeant Jeffords

Rosa: You know, I know I just got here, but it feels like everything's falling apart.
Jake: No, everything's going great, Rosa.
Sergeant Jeffords: Hey, cool. I'm not the only one that's in denial. It's catching on.

Quote from Captain C.J. Jason Stentley

Jake: Gentlemen, may I present to you the Suicide Squad.
The Vulture: Hang on there, genius. You want us, your enemies, to help you bring down Commissioner Kelly?
Captain C.J. Jason Stentley: You guys consider me your enemy? You're some of my best friends.
Jake: We haven't talked to you in, like, three years, C.J.
Captain C.J. Jason Stentley: Wait, yeah. I'm thinking of different guys.

Quote from Captain Holt

Jake: That was our last obstacle, except for one other thing. I promised her that you would apologize for everything you've ever done to her.
Captain Holt: Including the Michelle Obama incident?
Jake: Yes, she mentioned that specifically. I'm very curious what happened there.
Captain Holt: Oh, it's nothing. But fine. I'm sorry, Madeline, for everything.
Jake: Hey.
Captain Holt: Especially for pushing you into Michelle Obama from behind and then running away.
Jake: What?
Amy: Sir!
Captain Holt: It was very funny.

Quote from Captain C.J. Jason Stentley

Jake: So, we can assume Kelly authorized stingray surveillance and we missed it, but if we ratchet up the pressure on him, we might get another chance.
Charles: How do we ratchet up pressure more than we already have?
Jake: By making him believe that the "kidnappers" are serious, and that C.J.
is in real danger.
Amy: Ooh, what if we send Kelly a severed finger in a box?
Captain C.J. Jason Stentley: No way! I need all my fingers. How else am I gonna do the hang ten sign?
Amy: Nobody's cutting off your fingers. I meant we would get one from the morgue.

Quote from Sergeant Jeffords

Sergeant Jeffords: From the morgue? Man, we are always getting into the craziest situations. If I were leaving this squad, I'd miss these moments, but I'm not, so I won't.
Jake: Okay, seriously. What's going on with him?
Rosa: It's a whole thing.
Jake: Is it gonna screw up the plan?
Rosa: It's more quietly self-destructive.
Jake: Sounds good. Terry, do you.

Quote from The Vulture

Jake: Look, John Kelly has to be stopped. He's spying on civilians. It's unconstitutional and it's wrong.
Captain Holt: Please. Do you think any one of these jackals cares about what's right or wrong?
The Vulture: I'll help.
Jake: See, sir? There is good in every person.
The Vulture: But I want it to be known it's for selfish reasons.
Jake: Why would you want that to be known?
The Vulture: 'Cause I've never met C.J. before and I want him to think that I'm cool.
Captain C.J. Jason Stentley: It's working. I mean, I love how you're taking over the room. Like that?
The Vulture: Yeah, it's awesome.

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