Jake: [sings lullaby] ♪ Hello, Charles, fill me in ♪ Any breaks in the case?[whispering] If you sing everything as a lullaby, Mac won't wake up.
Charles: [sings lullaby] ♪ I understand ♪ ♪ The handyman has an alibi ♪ ♪ But I found something else ♪
Jake: You sound great.
Charles: [whispering] Thank you. ♪ The lab techs analyzed Franzia's phone call ♪ ♪ There were two other voices ♪ ♪ In the background ♪
Man: [on tape] Oh, who's a good boy? Who wants another bite?
Jake: [normal voice] Wait. Is that Scully feeding Mac? Was Franzia inside the building?
Charles: [normal voice] No, his voice is playing over a speaker in the background. Franzia must've bugged the precinct, and he was listening to it when we called him. [Mac crying] Shh, shh. ♪ But why would he ♪ ♪ Bug Scully's nap closet?
Jake: ♪ ♪ 'Cause he didn't bug the closet ♪ ♪ He bugged something brought inside ♪ [gasps] ♪ Oh, my God, Franzia ♪ ♪ Was the weird babysitter ♪
Charles: ♪ He gave the bug right to you ♪
Both: ♪ Son of a bitch ♪

Rosa: Come on, Peralta! Holt said to use the whole team. We all want this solved.
Jake: I appreciate the offer, but I work best alone. Except when it comes to sex. Actually, sometimes including sex.

Jake: I wasn't hurt that badly. The doctor said all my bleeding was internal. That's where the blood's supposed to be.

Jake: I guess that's your new best friend now, Santiago. Emphasis on "Iago," backstabber.
Amy: I'm surprised you've read Othello.
Jake: What the hell's Othello? I'm calling you the parrot from Aladdin.

Sergeant Jeffords: Listen up, everyone. We had a murder this morning. The vic was found at 8:45 by a dog walker who let herself into his apartment...
Jake: Oh, my God, it's Franzia! This is the work of Johnny Franzia, my white whale. He's finally resurfaced.
Sergeant Jeffords: Not this again.
Jake: Yes, this again. Johnny Franzia has been on a murder spree for the past ten years, and every time he kills someone, he taunts me. Look, there's a deck of cards.
Sergeant Jeffords: You say that whenever there's cards at a crime scene. You know how many people own cards, Jake?
Jake: Then explain this. Johnny Franzia's catchphrase is "deuces are wild." Now look around the apartment. Two chairs, two paintings, two pillows.
Sergeant Jeffords: There are three lamps.
Jake: You think Franzia gives a damn about lamps? You sound so dumb right now. This is why you don't have an arch nemesis, Terry, because you focus on all the wrong details.
Sergeant Jeffords: Maybe I don't have an arch nemesis because I solve all my crimes.
Jake: [silence] That's a pretty [bleep]-up thing to say to me.

Scully: Sure, I'll watch Mac. Don't worry, I've padded all the sharp edges in here.
Jake: Wow. You already baby-proofed it?
Scully: Ah, it's my nap room. You can take a nap anywhere in here. Every surface is like a bed.
Both: Huh.
Jake: Works for us.

Sergeant Jeffords: Hey, so don't freak out, but apparently there are several other groups presenting reform proposals to One Police Plaza, and only one will get funding.
Amy: Why would that make me freak out?
Sergeant Jeffords: Because you can be a little competitive.
Amy: [scoffs] That's not true. No one is less competitive than me. No one.