Quote from Jake in the episode Bad Beat
Captain Holt: Here's your persona: you're Billy "Big Time" Jankowski. You wear sunglasses, headphones, and an unwashed hoodie. You normally gamble online, from your mother's basement, where you live.
Jake: Seems unnecessary.
Sergeant Jeffords: The hoodie hides your sunglass-camera's electronics.
Jake: I more meant the living in my mom's basement virgin vibe.
Captain Holt: You added the virgin, but I like it. It's part of your backstory now.
Jake: But-
Captain Holt: You're a virgin. That's an order.
Jake: But I don't want to be a virgin again.
Quote from the episode The Vulture
Rosa: Come on, Peralta! Holt said to use the whole team. We all want this solved.
Jake: I appreciate the offer, but I work best alone. Except when it comes to sex. Actually, sometimes including sex.
Quote from the episode AC/DC
Jake: I wasn't hurt that badly. The doctor said all my bleeding was internal. That's where the blood's supposed to be.
Quote from the episode Operation Broken Feather
Jake: I guess that's your new best friend now, Santiago. Emphasis on "Iago," backstabber.
Amy: I'm surprised you've read Othello.
Jake: What the hell's Othello? I'm calling you the parrot from Aladdin.
Quote from Captain Holt
Captain Holt: Yes, yes, come to papa. Raise it a grand! Call. Raise. A pair of candy canes. I'm all in, baby.
Jake: What are you doing, sir?
Captain Holt: Working the case. Sharpening my poker skills for Valdano.
Jake: Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, and why are you watching this children's beauty pageant?
Captain Holt: For fun, obviously. No, Jayla, don't drop the baton. No, I had so much riding on you!
Quote from Captain Holt
Jake: It was the "shouldn't've" that finally tipped me off. I've never heard you use a double contraction before.
Captain Holt: And you never will again.