A collection of quotes about Jake Peralta's favorite movie franchise, Die Hard.
Quote from Jake in the episode HalloVeen
Jake: Okay, here it goes. Ames, I love you. I love how smart you are. I love how beautiful you are. I love your face, and I love your butt. I should've written this down first.
Amy: No, no, it's okay. Go on.
Jake: I love how much you pretend to like Die Hard.
Amy: I like the second one.
Jake: You don't have to.
Amy: Okay.
Jake: Yeah. You're kind, and you're funny, and you're the best person I know, and the best detective. Also, for reals, I love your butt.
Amy: I love yours too.
Jake: Gross. Amy Santiago will you marry me?
Amy: Jake Peralta, I will marry you.
Quote from Jake in the episode The Slump
Jake: Die Hard is the best cop movie of all time. One cop heroically saving the day while every one else stands around and watches. It's the story of my life.
Quote from Jake in the episode Yippie Kayak
Jake: Oh my God, it's real life Die Hard. I mean, oh, no, crime.
Quote from Jake in the episode Captain Latvia
Jake: Trust me, it's gonna be fine.
Charles: Really? 'Cause you said that about Die Hard 5, Jake.
Jake: Oh. It's not gonna be fine.
Quote from Amy in the episode Honeymoon
Captain Holt: What the hell is going on?
Jake: I can't let you quit.
Captain Holt: Yes, but why the candles and rose petals?
Jake: Wuh-oh.
Amy: Is that Mr. McClane I hear? 'Cause someone's about to Die Har- Oh, my God. Why is Captain Holt here?
Jake: Because he's gonna- Wait, are you dressed like Bonnie Bedelia in Die Hard?
Amy: I am.
Jake: For sexy reasons?
Amy: Yes.
Jake: Oh, boy.
Quote from Charles in the episode Stakeout
Charles: Okay, no butter-syrup, no talking about Die Hard.
Jake: Okay, I can do that.
Charles: Or Die Hard 2 or Die Hard 3.
Jake: What? Come on. So you just want me to talk about the fourth one?
Charles: There's a fourth one?
Jake: Charles!
Charles: No judging me for not knowing the Die Hard.
Quote from Charles in the episode Lights Out
Charles: Oh, my God, he's beautiful. Oh, Jake, he's got your face.
Amy: Charles, meet Mac.
Jake: Short for McClane.
Charles: As in Shirley? I love it.
Jake: No, as in John, from Die Hard.
Charles: I mean, they're both incredibly cool. Only one Oscar winner.
Quote from Jake in the episode Skyfire Cycle
Jake: All the death threats were sent from New York, so the perp is local. They'll probably try and strike at the book reading tomorrow night.
Sergeant Jeffords: And he's probably camped out on the street with the other fan boys. They've been lined up for three days.
Jake: To listen to an old man read a story? I will never understand this world.
Sergeant Jeffords: You once took a train to Toronto to get a Canadian VHS copy of Die Hard.
Jake: There was a rumor it was better sound quality. Get a grip, Terry.
Quote from Jake in the episode 99
Jake: Can we go in, sir?
Captain Holt: Fine, just make it quick.
Jake: Yes! Pull in over there, Argyle!
Captain Holt: What?
Jake: That's the name of the driver in the movie. We're going to Nakatomi Plaza. There's gonna be role-play.
Quote from Amy in the episode Honeymoon
Jake: Okay, you ready?
Amy: Mm-hmm.
Jake: Hello.
Amy: Oh, my God. Are you Melvil Dewey?
Jake: Indeed I am. I invented the Dewey decimal system, but right now I'm working on the Do-me decimal system.
Amy: Mm-hmm, yeah. This is really working for me.
Jake: Really?
Amy: Yeah.
Jake: Awesome.
Amy: So, Mr. Dewey, can you save me from the terrorists that have taken over Nakatomi Plaza?
Jake: Yes, Holly Gennaro, I just need to file them in the library card catalog.
Amy: Yeah, this is really hard to track. Let's just take our clothes off.
Jake: Oh, thank God. This old jacket is so hot.
Quote from Jake in the episode The Venue
Jake: A Nakatomi Plaza cake? The groom is on a licorice hose.
Amy: [as Bruce Willis] Welcome to the wedding, pal.
Jake: Oh, Amy. These nups may be getting too toit.
Quote from Amy in the episode The Audit
Jake: I'm still not sure who the second-best Die Hard villain is, though, you know? Probably Jeremy Irons. But maybe it's Timothy Olyphant, or it could be William Atherton.
Amy: Definitely the last one.
Jake: Right?
[current:]
Amy: No, I really think it's William Atherton.
Quote from Amy in the episode The Audit
Amy: Teddy, I don't want to be with you.
Teddy: But you want to be with him? You guys have nothing in common.
Amy: Oh, yeah? Tell that to William Atherton the man we both consider to be the second-best Die Hard villain.
Jake: [gasps] She meant it.
Quote from Jake in the episode Yippie Kayak
Charles: How are going to get past them without a gun fight?
Jake: I'll tell you how John McClane would do it. The vents.
Charles: Ah, blast the A/C, they get chilly, they leave to find sweaters.
Jake: No, we're gonna climb through them.
Charles: Even better. Classic use of vents.
Quote from Jake in the episode Admiral Peralta
Jake: Okay, both of you, stop. You're acting like children. You know what? That's it, if you're gonna act like kids, then I'm gonna act like a parent.
Roger Peralta: "Cry Hard with a Vengeance"?
Jake: Yeah. It's Bruce Willis's book about parenting. And we're gonna read it.
Quote from Jake in the episode Yippie Kayak
Jake: This is my John McClane moment.
Quote from Jake in the episode Terry Kitties
Sergeant Jeffords: What up, Jake? Why are these dicks out of their cage?
Jake: I stayed up all night working on your case, and Hans, John, and Nakatomi made for great company. I gave them all Die Hard names.
Quote from Charles in the episode Yippie Kayak
Charles: Yippie kayak, other buckets!
Jake: Boyle! You did it! And you completely botched the catchphrase.
Charles: I'm pretty sure it was right.
Jake: No, but you did great.