Quotes from ‘The Last Day (Part 2)’

The Last Day (Part 2)

The Last Day (Part 2)
Season 8, Episode 10 - Aired September 16, 2021

As the final heist continues, Jake isn't the only one trying to give everyone the perfect goodbye.

Quote from Jake

[about a year later:]
Sergeant Jeffords: Now that that's been sorted, are there any questions?
Jake: Yes! I have a question! Captain Jeffords, are you ready for the Halloween Heist?
Sergeant Jeffords: What are you doing, Peralta? Last year was the final heist. We all agreed it was over.
Jake: Ah, Terry, you jolly simpleton. That was obviously a ruse. I mean, did you really think I was gonna let Hitchcock win the last heist? I mean, that would be crazy! Hitchcock? It would've been unforgiveable.
Hitchcock: That's true, it felt wrong.
Captain Holt: I know someone who's in. The old janitor, which is actually me! Deputy Commissioner Raymond Holt.
Amy: And he's not the only one. I'm in too.
Rosa: Me too.
Gina: As am I. Gina Linetti.
Jake: That's right, Terry, this is happening every year. We're in each other's lives forever, whether you like it or not. So, what do you say, Captain? Are we doing this?
Sergeant Jeffords: What I say is... Nine-Nine!
All: Nine-Nine!

Quote from Jake

Jake: Hello? Hello? Is there anyone here? Mlepnos?
Mlepnos: No.
Jake: What? Yeah. You played violin at my wedding. You're Mlepnos!
Mlepnos: No, my name is Jerry. Jerry Barfralatistan.
Jake: What? It doesn't matter. I need your help. Can you please hand me the keys that are down there?
Mlepnos: Yeah, yeah, yes. Thank you, I love keys.
Jake: Oh...
Mlepnos: And this is for you. [soft chirping]
Jake: What?
Mlepnos: As they say in my country, a chicky for a key.
Jake: Right. And what country is that again?
Mlepnos: Honolulu.
Jake: Okay. You know, if it's all the same, I'd really just rather have the key.
Mlepnos: You no want chicky? I don't want key.
Jake: Oh, perfect. Yes! Thank you, Mlepnos.
Mlepnos: No, it's Jerry... Barkakanatsan.
Jake: I feel like maybe you said it a little different the first time.

Quote from Sergeant Jeffords

Sergeant Jeffords: Can't you see? You all want the same thing, a perfect goodbye. But you're all getting in each other's way. We are the Nine-Nine, and we work best together. And we're getting out of here together. So we're gonna find that tube and we're gonna be crowned Grand Champions of the Nine-Nine together!
Caroline Saint-Jacques Renard: Except for the ugly one that made fun of my cello.
Sergeant Jeffords: Not now, Caroline Saint-Jacques Renard.
Captain Holt: I agree with Jeffords. Read the room, Caroline Saint-Jacques Renard.
Rosa: Great speech, Terry, but we're kind of trapped in here.
Sergeant Jeffords: Not for long. I'm gonna Kool-Aid Man us the hell out of here.
Jake: I thought you said that was impossible.
Sergeant Jeffords: It's not, I just find it demeaning. It's actually very easy.
Jake: Ah!
Sergeant Jeffords: [crashing] Oh, yeah!
Jake: Oh, yes! Now go through that wall!
Sergeant Jeffords: I'm not doing any more walls, Jake, we're free.
Jake: Fair enough, I had to ask.

Quote from Hitchcock

Hitchcock: I bet you're all wondering how I pulled it off.
Rosa: Not really, but I guess that's the tradition.
Hitchcock: The key to the whole plan was that I never really retired or moved to Brazil. I've been living in the Beaver Trap this whole time.
Jake: Okay, but what was the rest of the plan?
Scully: Oh, we had not come up with it. But then Bill came by and offered to sell me the tube for 40 bucks and I won.
Scully: Pretty good stuff.
Hitchcock: Now, crown me.
Jake: Ugh, this stinks. Okay, Michael Hitchcock, you are an amazing human/genius and the Grand Champion of the Nine-Nine. Why is your head so sweaty?
Hitchcock: Oh, because that's actually butt skin from a botched hair transplant so there are more pores.
Jake: I can't believe this is how it ends, with Hitchcock's sweaty butt head.
Scully: I told myself I wouldn't cry.

Quote from Jake

Charles: Ah, Jake, I'm sorry you didn't get your perfect goodbye.
Jake: Yeah. This whole thing did kinda turn into a scalding hot mess. But to be honest, I think I just wanted a big dramatic moment so that I wouldn't feel sad. Because goodbyes are inherently sad. They mean that something's ending. And this one is especially sad because what we had was so great. But it's not all sad, right? We're moving on to things that we love. And we'll always have the memories of our times together, even though Hitchcock won the heist, which makes me so mad I wanna swallow my own tongue and die.
Captain Holt: It's a disgrace.
Jake: Anyways, I say we hang out, have a drink, and enjoy all of us being together one last time. To the squad.
All: To the squad.
Gina: You just drank cement! [all spit out]
Sergeant Jeffords: Why?

Quote from Jake

Jake: The plan was lure everyone to the Brooklyn Bridge and give you all gifts. So, here's yours.
Charles: Oh!
Jake: The dummy tubes just unscrew.
Charles: Okay. The most recent issue of Fancy Brudgom magazine?
Jake: You know how you always wanted them to do a Fancy Bedste Venner feature on us?
Charles: Yeah, but that's just for the fanciest best friends.
Jake: Turn to page 63.
Charles: Oh, my God, you didn't. You did! We're Fancy Bedste Venners!
Jake: We're Fancy Bedste Venners!
Both: We're Fancy Bedste Venners!

Quote from Captain Holt

Captain Holt: So, you're leaving. That must've been a hard decision.
Jake: Honestly... [looks at Amy] It wasn't.
Captain Holt: It's funny. On my first day here, I asked Jeffords to tell me about everyone. He told me you were a great detective, but the one thing you couldn't figure out was how to grow up. Well... I think you've finally figured it out.
Jake: Well, thank you, sir. I couldn't have done it without you.
Captain Holt: Over the years, you've sometimes referred to me as something of a father figure.
Jake: Did I? I didn't realize that.
Captain Holt: But I want you to know if I had had a son and, uh, he had turned out like you, I would be very proud of him.
Jake: Thank you, sir. Wow. Wasn't expecting to get this emotional.
Captain Holt: It's not bad for an old robot, huh? Beep-borp. Zeep.
Jake: [chuckles] Sir, did you just make a joke?
Captain Holt: I believe I did, yes. I guess in the end, we rubbed off on each other quite a bit. Title of your sex movie. Did I do that right?
Jake: It was perfect. [both chuckle softly]

Quote from Charles

Jake: Charles, I just want to be there for Mac.
Charles: I get that, but this whole thing is just taking me by surprise. I don't know if I can come in to work and do this job without you.
Jake: Are you kidding me? I mean, maybe the you of nine years ago couldn't handle it, but you're not that person anymore. You used to live in your ex-wife's husband's basement and date 75-year-olds and now you've got your own house and Genevieve and Nikolaj.
Charles: Nikolaj.
Jake: Nikolaj.
Charles: Nikolaj.
Jake: Nikolaj.
Charles: Nikolaj.
Jake: Why don't you just call him Nick?
Charles: Nik.
Jake: All right, now you're ruining the moment.
Charles: Copy that.

Quote from Jake

Sergeant Jeffords: Wait, wait, wait, did you say your goodbye to the Nine-Nine? Where you going?
Jake: Uh, well, I was hoping that this would be a more dramatic moment accompanied by fireworks but... I'm leaving the NYPD.
Captain Holt: You are?
Rosa: What?
Gina: Theriouthly?
Sergeant Jeffords: For real?
Jake: Yeah. Today was my last day. And now it looks like it's gonna end with all of us locked in a storage facility.

Quote from Sergeant Jeffords

Captain Holt: You see, the whole heist was a ruse for the perfect goodbye I planned.
Jake: I mean, it wasn't that perfect. A real perfect goodbye would've had...
Captain Holt: Sentimental gifts for everyone?
Jake: Damn it! Just tell us how you did it.
Captain Holt: Everything hinged on Jeffords. I needed him to drop out of the heist so he'd have access to everyone's secrets, which is why I set up a fake interview for him.
Sergeant Jeffords: You were working with Williams? But he locked us in his office.
Captain Holt: Which was critical to me gaining your trust so you'd tell me where the tube was hidden.
Sergeant Jeffords: Terry's reeling.
Captain Holt: Armed with that information, I texted Kevin who retrieved the tube and handed it off to a person who lured you all here and that person was a dog and that dog was Cheddar.
Sergeant Jeffords: Hold up. That big speech about how I'd make a great captain, that was all a lie?
Captain Holt: No, no, I meant every word of it. In fact, it's exactly what I said to the real Williams two weeks ago. It's part of the reason he decided to make you... the new captain of the Nine-Nine.
Sergeant Jeffords: Wait, what? Is this fake too? Y'all need to cut the [bleep] and be honest with me. This is my life we're talking about.

Quote from Scully

Captain Holt: You want to know if it's real? Open your gift and find out.
Sergeant Jeffords: A bag of fish?
Captain Holt: What? No. It's supposed to be your captain's bars.
Jake: The fish are my present to Scully. They're the kind that eat the dead skin off your feet.
Scully: Ooh, they're gonna have a feast tonight.

Quote from Amy

Captain Holt: But wait, if that's not Terry's bars, what's in the real tube? Wireless headphones?
Amy: They're AirPods. They're my gift for everyone.
Jake: What? But you told me not to get people AirPods! You said everyone already has headphones!
Amy: Yeah, so you wouldn't buy them and I would get all the glory.
Scully: Wow. Great gift, Amy.
Jake: Come on!

Quote from Captain Holt

Jake: Okay, according to the tracker it's close. Let's just agree that we're gonna pick it up and head to the Brooklyn Bridge.
Amy: Yeah, I agree. That you can suck it! We will end up at Shaw's, which is actually a meaningful final location. [tires screech, horn honks]
Sergeant Jeffords: Are we too late? Did you get the tube?
Jake: No, it's somewhere in this building. Brooklyn Storage Solutions.
Amy: Wait a second.
Charles: I know this place.
Jake: Yes, this is where we worked our first case with Captain Holt.
Captain Holt: That's right, it's a meaningful location. Tonight is my victory lap. I planned the perfect goodbye.
Jake: You have gotta be kidding me.

Quote from Rosa

Rosa: So, my plan was simple. The best way to win is to sit back, watch everyone else, and then choose your moment. But to do that, I needed people to think I was gone.
Gina: It's a trick she learned from me. [lisping] During the fourth heist, universally considered the best heist.
Rosa: You were so eager to think I'd drop everything and chase after Adrian.
Amy: So you don't want to end up with Pimento?
Rosa: No, but you believed it because you all think for someone to be happy, their story has to end with marriage and kids.
Amy: I mean, I believed it because you told me and I trust you.
Rosa: Whatever, breeder.

Quote from Gina

Rosa: Anyway, with nobody watching me, I was able to figure out what Holt was up to and then I had my other partner intercept Cheddar.
Sergeant Jeffords: Who was that?
Bill: It's me, Bill.
Gina: Thurprithe reveal.

Quote from Jake

Rosa: So, let's crown me. The Grand Champion of the Nine-Nine. [opens tube] A six-month subscription to the Rosetta Stone?
Captain Holt: That's my present for Peralta.
Jake: Your present to me is school? I'm glad you're leaving.

Quote from Jake

Charles: He's gone, we're trapped!
Caroline Saint-Jacques Renard: Pardon me, excuse me. Did you just say we're trapped?
Jake: Who the hell are you?
Captain Holt: You don't recognize Caroline Saint-Jacques Renard? The associate principal cellist for the Berlin Philharmonic? She's my surprise celebrity.
Jake: Are you kidding me? You ruined my big goodbye to the Nine-Nine so we can listen to some nerd play a giant violin?
Caroline Saint-Jacques Renard: Shall I begin?
Jake: No.

Quote from Jake

Jake: [sighs] Well, I guess this is it. So long, Nine-Nine. [turns off lights]
Janitor: Hey!
Sergeant Jeffords: What are you doing? You can't turn off the lights at a working police precinct!
Jake: Right, sorry. Got caught up in my own thing. There we go.

Quote from Hitchcock

Captain Holt: Are you sure he came back to the precinct? The tracker must be broken. There's no one here.
Hitchcock: Wrong, Captain! I'm here. Michael Hitchcock, the Grand Champion of the Nine-Nine.
Charles: Hitchcock?
Jake: Well, this doesn't feel right.

Quote from Scully

Hitchcock: I missed you, bud.
Scully: I missed you too. [they hug]
Hitchcock: [sniffs] Mmm. You got wing sauce on your collar.
Scully: I left it there for you.

Quote from Rosa

Amy: Hey, can I talk to you for a sec? I just want you to know that I don't care if you end up with anyone or get married or whatever. I just want you to be happy.
Rosa: I am happy. I'm making a difference, I've got great friends. Also, I'm moving in with my girlfriend, Debra. She is amazing. She makes me feel whole.
Amy: Oh, really?
Rosa: Oh, my God, this is too easy. No, I don't want to settle down.
Amy: Right. I'm sorry, sorry.
Rosa: It's fine. I'm just messing with you. It's crazy you're leaving. We spent a lot of time here.
Amy: Yeah, we did. I'm really happy it was with you.
Rosa: Same here. I love you.
Amy: I love you too. [glasses clink]

Quote from Gina

Gina: Hey, guys, can I be real? I just took a bunch of diamonds from the evidence locker. No one ever changed the code. Anyway, toodaloo.
Sergeant Jeffords: Was she being real?
Charles: I honestly can't tell.

Quote from Charles

Sergeant Jeffords: Hey, Boyle, I'm glad you're sticking around. I'm gonna be depending on you a lot.
Charles: You got it, Captain, for diet and exercise tips.
Sergeant Jeffords: What? No. To solve cases. My body's fine.
Charles: Nice, that's a very healthy attitude.

Quote from Amy

Dr. Midj: Okay, let's do some cognitive tests. How good is your memory from before the accident? Do you remember the fireworks?
Jake: Yeah, I remember everything. I remember the whole heist, going to find Charles, the magnet suits.
Amy: Do you remember where you hid the tube?
Jake: Yeah, inside the fake baby.
Amy: Thanks, babe. [handcuffs Jake to the bed]
Jake: Oh, no. It's not the future, is it?
Amy: No, it's only been about 40 minutes? And this isn't a real hospital. [press button]
Jake: You Mission: Impossibled me! Oh, I'm so happy you're not having sex with Teddy!

Quote from Jake

Jake: Hey, bud.
Charles: How'd you know where I was?
Jake: Because this is where you had to be because this is where it happened.
[flashback: nine years ago:]
Charles: Hey.
Jake: Hey. Sorry to drag you in on the weekend.
Charles: Oh, it's fine, I don't mind spending a few hours with my best friend. I shouldn't have said that. It was too soon.
Jake: No. Charles, you're my best friend too.
Dr. Oliver Cox: Hey, guys. I found another leg!
Jake: Oh, how gross!
[present:]
Jake: I forgot that we wore those fashion scarves for like a month that year.
Charles: I still think they worked.
Jake: No.

Quote from Charles

Charles: Oh, Jake, I can't believe you're leaving. I mean, it's not the Nine-Nine without you.
Jake: I know, but Rosa's already gone and Holt and Amy are moving on too.
Charles: Is that why you're doing this? To fit in with that crowd?

Quote from Charles

Jake: Look, whether we work together or not, we're always gonna be best friends and partners.
Charles: Right. Life partners.
Jake: Best friends.

Quote from Amy

Jake: Hey, great news, the perfect goodbye is back on and we have a new teammate.
Amy: Really? What even is "our team?" Because I know you gave me a dummy tube.
Jake: Ah, and did you find what was inside of it?
Amy: Yeah, an egg.
Jake: And do you know why I gave you an egg?
Amy: 'Cause eggs suck and you're still mad about that one time I beat you at Mario Kart?
Jake: It was beginner's luck! Just... open it.
Amy: A necklace with a little binder on it?
Jake: It has three tiny tabs. One for me, one for you, and one for Mac.
Amy: Aw! It really bothers me that they're not alphabetical but I assume that it's functional and I can correct them?
Jake: It is and you can.
Amy: Then I love it and I'll treasure it forever. Now tell me where the real tube is, you bastard!

Quote from Jake

Amy: You're cutting me out? This is about you wanting fireworks, isn't it?
Jake: Oh, Amy, it's about so much more than that.
[later:]
Jake: It's one million percent just about the fireworks.
Charles: Those look very dangerous.
Jake: No, it'll be fine. We're not gonna be anywhere near when it goes off. You control the whole thing from your phone.
Charles: How do you know when it's armed?
Jake: The red light starts blinking.
Charles: Like that one?
Jake: Uh-oh, uh, uh... you know what? This is okay, this is okay. I can just turn it off using the app. "Set up your profile first?" Why? How many times am I gonna use a fireworks app?
Charles: It started counting down!
Jake: Name, email. "Select the squares with stop signs in them?"
Charles: Okay, Jake, we gotta go!
Jake: Is a stop light a stop sign? Charles, is a stop light a stop sign?
Charles: I don't know, they both require full stops! Jake, come on!
Jake: All right, I'm in. No, "username already taken?" Who would want to use "Jake?" [countdown beeping] Oh, no.

Quote from Jake

Amy: Oh, my God. You're awake. I can't believe it, you're actually awake.
Jake: Hey. Wait a minute. What's going on? I gotta get back to the heist.
Amy: No, the heist? Jake, you've been in a coma for seven years.
Jake: What?

Quote from Amy

Jake: What do you mean I've been in a coma?
Dr. Midj: A firework hit you in the head. It caused a destabilizing brain injury.
Jake: Oh, my God. Is Charles okay?
Amy: Yes. He survived the explosion, but he blamed himself for what happened to you so he left New York. He's actually the sheriff of a small town in Arizona. The town is so small he also has to be the school principal.
Jake: Okay, that's weird.
Amy: It's actually very funny. And surprisingly heartwarming.

Quote from Amy

Jake: Wait, no. No, no, no. This... this isn't really happening. I'm dreaming. And because this is a dream, I'm in control. You know who's gonna walk through that door right now? Bruce Willis.
Teddy: [enters] Jake, you woke up!
Jake: No! Teddy? Amy, why is your ex-boyfriend here?
Teddy: Oh, you haven't told him yet, babe?
Amy: Uh.
Jake: Babe? He called you babe. What's going on?
Amy: I'm sorry, I know this is a lot.
Jake: No.
Amy: But the last seven years have been really hard. Raising Mac on my own, never knowing if you would wake up, and Teddy was a great friend to me. And a couple years ago, we went on a trip.
Teddy: It's not her fault. We were both seduced by the city of Tampa.
Jake: I can't believe this. You replaced me with Teddy?
Teddy: I could never replace you, Jake. I just wanted Mac to have a father figure in his life. I come over and we watch sports. We are obsessed with college swimming.
Jake: Hey, doc, can you put me back in the coma?
Dr. Midj: You're agitated, that's normal. Tell me how you're feeling. Pain?
Jake: I mean, just the pain of learning that my wife is married to another man.
Teddy: Oh, we're not married. I'm just here for Amy physically.
Jake: That's worse!

Quote from Sergeant Jeffords

Captain Holt: Damn it, we're locked in. Who are you working with, you coward?
Sergeant Jeffords: I didn't do anything. I bet this was all Santiago's plan. She's making a play for the tube. She knew you hid it at Doggy Daycare.
Captain Holt: How do you know her plan?
Sergeant Jeffords: Since I wasn't part of the heist, people were sloppy around me with their secrets. I know everything. For instance, I know the real tube is inside that creepy, fake baby doll.
Captain Holt: Why didn't you tell me this earlier?
Sergeant Jeffords: I was trying to be respectful of the heisting process, but that was before I got screwed over.
Captain Holt: Well, your intel is of no use since we're locked in here. Unless you smash your gigantic body through the wall.
Sergeant Jeffords: I am not the Kool-Aid Man!
Captain Holt: Okay.
Sergeant Jeffords: I am more than my muscles and I can prove it. All the locks in this building have a magnetic release in case of a fire. If we can overload the circuit, they'll unlock. We just need to connect the positive terminal of one outlet... [grunts] To the negative of the other, using this circuit board and a low-resistance wire. Luckily, I came prepared.
Captain Holt: Do suspenders conduct electricity? Oh, the gold thread!
Sergeant Jeffords: Now, we are about to overload the circuit. [electricity zapping]
Captain Holt: Bing pot!

Quote from Gina

Rosa: My point is, when Adrian and I broke up, something felt off. I think it's 'cause I wasn't out yet so I couldn't really be myself with anyone. But I don't know, I always thought we would end up together. And now he's going away and... ugh, this is stupid.
Amy: It's not stupid. You gotta tell him how you feel.
Rosa: He's already at the airport and he doesn't own a phone. I'll never make it in time.
Gina: Yes, you will! Another surprise reveal.
Amy: I mean, we knew you were around.
Rosa: I watched you enter.
Gina: Nope, you were both shocked. Come on, I'll give you a ride to the airport.
Rosa: I mean, that's nice but traffic.
Gina: Oh, sweet Rosa. There's no such thing as traffic when you're driving in an armored truck.
Rosa: Okay, let's do this.
Gina: I already have my keys. Ooh, yet another surprise reveal.

Quote from Amy

Jake: When did you have time to build all this?
Amy: Oh, I had it prefabbed months ago, and I set it up while you were looking for Charles.
Jake: You planted the resignation letter in my locker so Charles would find it.
Amy: Yep. And then I knew you'd wanna show off the fireworks. The fireworks that I sold you.
Jake: You're Kristaps?
Amy: [Ukrainian: "Of course I'm Kristaps."]
Jake: Gah, I got to stop falling for that.

Quote from Amy

Jake: But wait, if everything was fake, what knocked me out?
[flashback:]
Jake: [timer beeping rapidly] Oh, no. [Jake passes out when Amy holds a rag over his mouth]
Charles: What are you doing?
Amy: I know, Charles, but there's something I have to tell you, okay? [holds rag over Charles' mouth]
[present:]
Amy: I locked Charles in a supply closet.
Jake: I have but two things to say to you. One: thank you. I've always wanted to be chloroformed. And, two: how dare you?
Amy: Sorry, babe. But I play to win. [drops key]
Jake: Gah! That was super cool. I hate how attracted I am to you right now!

Quote from Amy

Amy: That worked so well. On to phase two. Thanks for doing that, Teddy. I'm really glad that we could be friends again.
Teddy: Of course. I'll always be here for you. Which is why I have a question to ask.
Amy: Oh, no.
Teddy: Amy Santiago, will you marry...
Amy: No! I am married to Jake.
Teddy: And I'm married to Elizabeth. It's perfect. Plus, you just betrayed him. You guys are obviously having issues.
Amy: No, I only betrayed him to pull off my secret plan. I am throwing him the perfect goodbye and it has to be a surprise.
Teddy: Fine. But if you think I'm just gonna sit around and wait for you change your mind... you're right. I will be parked outside for two more hours.

Quote from Rosa

Rosa: Hey, can I talk to you? I have a question.
Amy: Is it will I ever forgive you for betraying me and abandoning me in a car?
Rosa: No, I have no questions about that interaction. It was funny and I'm pleased with how it played out. This isn't about the heist. What did you think about, um, me and Pimento as a couple?
Amy: Oh, uh, I don't know. You guys always made me a little uncomfortable. There weren't a lot of boundaries.
Rosa: Is this about that time we smashed in your car?
Amy: You did? Which car?
Rosa: All of them. And once in your dad's Miata.

Quote from Amy

Jake: Amy, Amy, we've got a problem. Charles found out I was leaving somehow and he got so upset that he ran away. I don't know where he went and he's not answering his phone.
Amy: Don't you have a tracker implanted in his brain or something?
Jake: Amy, I would never do that. It's a serious medical procedure. Which is why I had a doctor do it eight years ago when they were operating on the bullet wounds in Charles' butt.
Amy: Smart, stick it in his butt holes.
Jake: Oh, I was expecting more judgment from you. And definitely a different phrasing.

Quote from Captain Holt

Sergeant Jeffords: Sir, I've made a terrible mistake. I am sorry about your pictures and your award and your computer...
Deputy Chief Williams: And yelling that I was wearing a wig and then trying to tear out my actual hair?
Sergeant Jeffords: No, that was a compliment! It's so thick and full for a man of your age.
Deputy Chief Williams: What?
Captain Holt: Let me handle this. The truth is, Lieutenant Jeffords acted like an irresponsible, insane madman.
Sergeant Jeffords: What?
Deputy Chief Williams: Yeah, that's what I was thinking.
Captain Holt: But looking at this incident from a different angle, it shows why he'll make a great captain. He's here before you owning his mistake. When I started at the Nine-Nine, I felt I had to be seen as infallible. But he taught me the importance of being seen as human. He made me a better leader. And you would be a fool not to make him a captain.
Sergeant Jeffords: Terry's touched.
Deputy Chief Williams: Yes, powerful words. As are these: happy heisting, suckas!
Both: What?
Deputy Chief Williams: Oh, you were right, this was a wig. [rips off wig] Ow. [exits]
Both: No!

Quote from Charles

[about a year later:]
Sergeant Jeffords: Shaheen and Dunn, you're on the Prospect Park tagger. Gates, Nahar, remember to check in with Forensics. Boyle, Larkin, I want you working the J Street Axe murder.
Detective Larkin: Ooh, we're the butcher bimbos.
Charles: No.
Detective Larkin: The butcher babes.
Charles: Nope.
Detective Larkin: Detective Boyle and his little butcher buddy.
Charles: Oh, I like that.

Quote from Jake

Rosa: All right, who has the real tube?
Bill: I do. [shutters close] [all shouting at once]
Charles: What are you doing, Bill?
Bill: [o.s.] I'm sorry, but this is your fault for ending the heists.They're my only source of income. You're still my best friends. Goodbye!
Jake: Bill!

Quote from Gina

Captain Holt: But if I don't have the winning tube, who does?
Rosa: [shutters open] I do.
Gina: Yet another surprise reveal again.

Quote from Jake

Jake: There you are, my cheating my wife! Give me the tube.
Amy: I don't have it. The baby's empty. You lied to me!
Jake: I'm not the liar, you're the liar. I put a tracker in the tube so I know you've hidden it somewhere in this... nope, you were telling the truth, it's on the move. Someone else has it.

Quote from Jake

Jake: It doesn't matter what you do, Ames, you're not gonna ruin this for me.
Amy: Sorry, Jake, but I'm afraid I have to. You'll thank me later.
Jake: Wait, what does that mean?
Charles: [sits up] I know what it means! [both gasp] I heard you talking to Teddy outside the supply closet you locked me in.
Amy: Damn it! How did you get out? [soft chirping]
Jake: [gasps] Mlepnos.
Charles: Amy's throwing you the perfect goodbye.
Jake: Over my dead butt crack, she is. Although, thank you, that was a very nice thought. Now drive!

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