Jake: Charles, it looks amazing.
Amy: It's beautiful. How can I ever repay you?
Charles: Get pregnant. Use your body to give the world more Jake.
Jake: Holy crap. All right. I'm gonna take Charles away from you now. I will see you up there.

Teddy: Okay, Amy. I got through every room and I cleared them very fast, because I love you and I want you to be happy, even if it's with somebody else. Did that new tactic work?
Amy: No.
Jake: You just called it a tactic.

Charles: So here it is. I really hope you like it. But if you don't, I will kill myself.

Amy: Did you talk to our parents?
Jake: Yeah. They ended up having dinner together. It sounded like they had fun. Our dads only got in one arm-wrestling match.
Amy: Who won?
Jake: Neither. They both threw out their shoulders.

Charles: No! I was eavesdropping. I'm always eavesdropping.
Jake: I don't like it.
Charles: Look, I didn't spend the last seven years watching your love ripen, only to have it sullied by a city hall wedding. You're getting married right here, right now.

Charles: This is happening. Jake and Amy are getting married tonight. Title of my sex tape!
Jake: What?

Jake: But, look, I know it seems like everything sucks, but why don't we just get married tomorrow? You know, we won't have a venue or a band or any of our guests, but we could go to city hall.
Amy: Jake, do you really want to get married in the same place people go to get restraining orders?
Jake: Amy Santiago, I would marry you any time, any place. I would marry you in the steaming filth of the Gowanus Canal.
Amy: Sweet. But also, gross.
Jake: I would marry you on the G Train in the summertime when the air conditioning is broken.
Amy: Damn, really?
Jake: I would marry you on top of the Empire State Building.
Amy: Well, that sounds kind of nice.
Jake: During a King Kong attack.
Amy: Oh, yeah, that's not good. Okay. City hall it is.

Jake: You look beautiful.
Amy: Thank you. This dress is incredible. Gina, this would have been so crazy if you wore this to our wedding.
Gina: I know.

Amy: Boyle, I don't even have a dress.
Charles: You can wear Gina's. I'm sure it's white.
Amy: There's no way Gina was gonna wear a white dress to my wedding.
[later]
Gina: No, I definitely was.
Amy: What?
Gina: I thought you'd just wear a Grey pantsuit or something. I would never wear a Grey pantsuit to your wedding, I promise you that.

Captain Holt: Where is he? Cheddar? Cheddar! Cheddar the dog!
Gina: Oh, he ate the cake.
Captain Holt: Oh, Cheddar, you furry little pig.

Amy: Are you actually mad that someone might not hate you?
Jake: Yeah, I am, Amy! Oh, wow, that's a bad color on me, isn't it?

Sergeant Jeffords: Here it is. Uh-oh. It's kind of dirty looking. But, you know, that's why they put it in a dry cleaning bag. I'm sure everything inside is totally ... Nope. Soaked in urine. Damn it, New York!

Jake: Oh, man, you got a whole shrine! Even the eyes are all scratched out.
Amy: Babe, when we're married, we're gonna share everything. Bank accounts, health insurance, arch-nemeses.
Jake: Aww, that's nice, Ames, but you don't have to say that. Charles, will you put this picture of me up on the wall?
Charles: Copy that. You want the eyes scratched out?
Jake: Uh, you know I do.

Teddy: First of all, there's nothing inherently creepy about a wall of Amy photos.

Alicia: So I only had one passenger after you, and he got off here.
Sergeant Jeffords: Well, what did he look like?
Alicia: I don't know. I mean, he was wearing some dumb hat. I'm sorry, I know that's not helpful-
Rosa: All hats are dumb. Ha! [snort]
Sergeant Jeffords: What the hell? Is that your laugh?