Season 2 Quotes Page 1 of 45

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Quote from Captain Holt in the episode The Wednesday Incident

Captain Holt: Coat! Coat! Jacket! Coat! Is this a police precinct or a Turkish bazaar?

Quote from Captain Holt in the episode The Mole

Captain Holt: Nothing's okay. Wuntch is circling me like a shark frenzied by chum. The task force turning into a career-threatening quagmire. An Internal Affairs investigation casting doubt upon my integrity. And you ask, is everything okay? I am buffeted by the winds of my foe's enmity and cast about by the towering waves of cruel fate. Yet I, a Captain, am no longer able to command my vessel, my precinct, from my customary helm, my office. And you ask, is everything okay? I've worked the better part of my years on earth overcoming every prejudice and fighting for the position I hold, and now I feel it being ripped from my grasp, and with it the very essence of what defines me as a man. And you ask, is everything okay?

Quote from Captain Holt in the episode Payback

Amy: Maybe we should talk about deets for the case. Plan our next move. Grab some chow.
Holt: No need. I brought these. Nutrition bricks. I have original no flavor, and whole wheat no flavor.

Quote from Gina in the episode Det. Dave Majors

Gina: If Rosa had a twin, she would have eaten her in the womb.

Quote from Gina in the episode Det. Dave Majors

Boyle: Are you leaving us for Copperhead?
Gina: Because I am prepared to light Charles on fire in protest.

Quote from Sergeant Jeffords in the episode Beach House

Terry: I'm playing Kwazy Cupcakes, I'm hydrated as hell, and I'm listening to Sheryl Crow. I've got my own party going on.

Quote from Scully in the episode Lockdown

Amy: Oh, so your plan is to not take this seriously at all?
Jake: Oh, I am as serious as a heart attack. No offense, Scully.
Scully: Nah. Mine are never that serious.
I call 'em "oopsies.

Quote from Sergeant Jeffords in the episode Stakeout

Terry: The hippo with heads on both ends, that's Hitchcock and Scully.
Amy: How do they defecate?
Terry: It's a kid's book, Santiago!

Quote from Captain Holt in the episode Payback

Captain Holt: He was a great partner. Smart, loyal. Homophobic but not racist. In those days that was pretty good.

Quote from Jake in the episode Payback

Jake: How much could I possibly owe you? Fifty/sixty bucks?
Terry: Two thousand, four hundred and thirty seven dollars.
Jake: Dollars?! Wait, of course dollars. Why was that the part I was surprised by?

Quote from Gina in the episode Defense Rests

Gina: So you choose your dad over me, your co-worker who hates you?

Quote from Gina in the episode Boyle-Linetti Wedding

Gina: My mom is marrying, shudder, Charles's dad, toilet emoji.

Quote from Jake in the episode AC/DC

Jake: I also have a hairline fracture in my thumb. Mankind's least important finger, am I right?

Quote from Captain Holt in the episode The Mole

Deputy Chief Wuntch: Hello, Raymond.
Captain Holt: Madeline. I wondered why all the birds had suddenly stopped singing. What brings you here?
Deputy Chief Wuntch: I heard you were under investigation by Internal Affairs. Didn't wanna miss that.
Captain Holt: So much time with your ear to the pavement, it's a pity a truck hasn't run over your head.

Quote from Sergeant Jeffords in the episode Beach House

Jake: You guys, this is gonna be fine. I mean Terry's our boss and he comes with us every year.
Terry: Correction, you bring Vacation Terry, and he is no man's boss. When the slippers are filled, Terry is chilled.

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