Season 3 Quotes Page 1 of 76

Searching Search quotes

Quote from Gina in the episode New Captain

Madeline Wuntch: Trent, Brice, where are we with the name?
Trent: We've narrowed it down to two choices. Petey or Paulie.
Gina: With all due respect, that Pigeon is clearly a Ray-Jay. Hi, Gina Linetti, the human form of the 100 Emoji.

Quote from Gina in the episode The Oolong Slayer

Captain Holt: Let's not overlook the fact that he turned his crime scenes into tea parties for dollies.
Gina: Which suggests pre-adolescent trauma leading to a pattern of criminality that probably began as a juvenile.

I'm taking an abnormal psych class, and everyone in it is obsessed with me.

Quote from Captain Holt in the episode The Cruise

Debbie: Look at you. Always working. What happened to my fun big brother?
Captain Holt: Fun? I was never fun. You take that back.

Quote from Amy in the episode Boyle's Hunch

Amy: This one says Die Pig. And worst of all, they didn't put the comma between die and pig.

Quote from Charles in the episode Into the Woods

Boyle: Is the equipment secure?
Jake: Check.
Boyle: Weapon loaded?
Jake: Check.
Boyle: Did you have breakfast?
Jake: What? That's not on the checklist.
Boyle: I added it because I care about you.
Jake: No, I did not have breakfast.
Boyle: Unacceptable. Look in your pocket.
Jake: Hey, there's little chocolate chips in this.
Boyle: Yeah, I'm not an idiot. I know how to trick my best friend into eating his fiber.

Quote from Amy in the episode The Cruise

Doug Judy: Thank God you were there, Peralta. I knew you wouldn't let your best friend die.
Jake: I'm still gonna arrest you. I just can't do that if you're dead.
Doug Judy: Whatever you gotta tell yourself. Baby steps. It's hard getting him out of his shell.
Amy: Tell me about it. Every time we get emotional, he's like, "Noice, smort."

Quote from Gina in the episode House Mouses

Gina: I'm scared of businessmen. A whole army of gray-suited Brads and Chads trying to suck my soul and redeem it for frequent flyer miles.

Quote from Rosa in the episode 9 Days

Rosa: I want to say a few words. When Jason died seven days ago, I didn't give a rat's ass.
Charles: This is your speech?
Rosa: 'Cause I didn't understand why people care so much about their dumb dogs till I got a dumb dog myself. I've only had Arlo for a day and a half, but if anything happened to him, I would kill everyone in this room and then myself.
Gina: Very violent eulogy, I like it.

Quote from Rosa in the episode Greg and Larry

Rosa: We can go to my apartment. No one knows where I live.
Sergeant Jeffords: I thought you had Amy over there once.
Rosa: Yeah, it was fun. I moved the next day.

Quote from Captain Holt in the episode New Captain

Madeline Wuntch: Sticks and stones, Raymond.
Captain Holt: Describing your breakfast?

Quote from Gina in the episode The Oolong Slayer

Jake: Wait a minute, I think I just figured something out.
I got to go.
Gina: Aren't you forgetting something?
*Jake gives Gina a kiss on the forehead*
Gina: Uh no, pay your bill! Damn, who raised you?

Quote from Jake in the episode The Mattress

Amy: He said he'll point him out to us.
So you approach on foot from the south, and me and Devon will be in an unmarked car here.
Jake: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. "Me and Devon"? Didn't you mean "Devon and I"?
Amy: Oh, God.
Jake: I corrected your grammar! Are you so proud of me? Are you horrified? Are you super horny?

Quote from Jake in the episode 9 Days

Jake: Medical examiner, jackpot. The gym is full of bodies.
Captain Holt: No, Department of Health.
Jake: Oh.
Captain Holt: There's been an outbreak of the mumps.
Jake: Mumps, that's a funny word.
Captain Holt: It's actually a very serious and highly contagious infectious disease.
Jake: Yeah, but we're fine. We were only in contact with that guy for a couple of seconds. Plus, he didn't even lick any of our eyeballs.

Quote from Sergeant Jeffords in the episode The 9-8

Captain Holt: Look, I know this is an inconvenience; however, I expect you all to be accommodating to our guests.
Sergeant Jeffords: Don't worry, sir, we will be cordial A.F. "As Frasier." Love that show.

Quote from Charles in the episode Greg and Larry

Charles: What about me? What if something happens to Jake, and he never gets to meet my baby? I don't want to hang out with some stupid baby who's never met Jake.

Showing quotes 1 to 15 of 1,134Sort by  popularity | date added | episode

Submit Quotes