Gina: Okay, the jurors found that super compelling. Just an update.
Jake: Thanks, Gina.
Gina: So, like, you're not making a good first impression.
Jake: Right. Thank you.
Gina: No doubt.

Samuel Miller: Objection. Conjecture!
Jake: Sustained. Sorry, you say it.
Judge Marinovich: Sustained.
Jake: We both sounded equally authoritative.

Lieutenant Melanie Hawkins: Oh, and one more thing. They're guilty.
Jake: No, we are not.
Judge Marinovich: Please don't address the jury, Mr. Peralta.
Jake: But, but, but-
Judge Marinovich: One more "but," and you will be in contempt.
Jake: [quietly] "One more 'but' and you're in contempt," name of your sex tape.

Sergeant Jeffords: Hey, Boyle. How you doing there, bud?
Charles: I'm fine. I'm great.
Sergeant Jeffords: Well, I hear your mouth say that, but the rest of your head is telling a different story. Feels like the stress of the upcoming trial is starting to get to you.
Charles: Oh, is this about my hair turning white?
Sergeant Jeffords: Yes, definitely.
Charles: It's not just the head hair. It's all of it. All. Of. It.
Sergeant Jeffords: I get it.
Charles: It's like an Eagles concert down there. Nothing but whites.
Sergeant Jeffords: Understood. You got white pubes.

Samuel Miller: Okay, so that's where we stand. Are there any questions or comments?
Captain Holt: Yes, there's something I'd like to say. Don't lose.
Sergeant Jeffords: Thought that was gonna be longer.
Jake: I loved it.
Rosa: It was perfect.

Sergeant Jeffords: There's no need to stress out. The lawyer's very confident.
Charles: Not good enough. I need to do everything I can to save Jake.
Sergeant Jeffords: Charles, you're falling apart. And that's not helping anyone. You need to get your crap in order.
Charles: Okay, you're right. I'll take a nap. I'll eat. I'll dye my pubes.
Sergeant Jeffords: You can dye all your hair.
Charles: No. There's no time.

Gina: Psst! Hey, Jake. I got you. Don't worry about it.
Jake: Really? How?
Gina: Among my many, many, many skills, I'm fluent in face. I can tell you what the jury's thinking at any given moment. I see an eyebrow twitch, I'm like, "Oh." If their cheek has a certain tension, okay, that leads me a different way. Watch this. Scully, you're wondering if anyone can smell your fart. The answer, my brother, is yes.
Scully: She's a witch.
Gina: What'd I tell you, boy? Trust me. I got you.

Amy: Should we talk about what happens if they somehow find you guilty?
Jake: That's not happening. But what we should talk about is how we're gonna celebrate when I win. I'm thinking we take a trip to Paris or London, Rome, anywhere Jason Bourne has driven a car down some stairs.
Amy: Paris sounds fun. Or we could just go somewhere we could actually afford.
Jake: Oh, we can afford it. Don't forget I robbed a bank. I'm sitting on $26 million, baby!
Judge Marinovich: Excuse me?
Amy: Oh! He's just kidding.
Jake: Yeah, I'm innocent. You'll see when we get in there. Nice talking to you, Judge.

Amy: Hey. Big day. How you feeling?
Jake: Good. Good. I was just working on my innocent face. Check it out.
"I'm a nice boy."
Amy: Oh, no. I don't think that's doing what you want it to at all.
Jake: Oh. Well, it doesn't matter, because my normal face is my innocent face, because I'm innocent.

Jake: I like your stupid courtroom clothes.
Rosa: Thanks. I like your stupid courtroom clothes.
Jake: Thank you.

Captain Holt: You got this.
Sergeant Jeffords: You got this.
Charles: You got this.
Jake: Charles, you're-
Charles: In a wheelchair, yep. My back gave out when I was dyeing my pubes. I was only halfway done. I'm like Cruella de Vil down there.

Jake: Okay, well, I need to go be on trial for bank robbery now, so maybe we can talk about this later?
Charles: Oh, right. Good luck.
Jake: Good luck to you.
Charles: About the?
Jake: Yes.
Charles: Thank you.
Jake: Okay.

Jake: Okay, update on our trial prep. This is our lawyer, Samuel Miller, who, in many ways, is in charge of our defense.
Samuel Miller: In every way.
Jake: Well, "many" is part of "every." I'm facing 15 years in prison. Just let me have this.

Samuel Miller: Prosecution claims you stole $26 million, but they can't trace that money to you in any way.
Jake: Yeah, I have negative $73 in my bank account. Ba-boom!
Amy: I'm somehow embarrassed and proud of you at the same time.
Jake: Yeah, that's my sweet spot.

Samuel Miller: We have airtight alibis for the other three bank robberies you all are accused of.
Amy: Yes, I pulled time sheets, witness statements, and security footage. We can show that both of you weren't present at any of the other robberies, except March 12th. Still not sure where Rosa was.
Rosa: And you never will be.