Brooklyn Nine-Nine Quotes

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Captain Holt: Coat! Coat! Jacket! Coat! Is this a police precinct or a Turkish bazaar?

Rosa: Come on, Peralta! Holt said to use the whole team. We all want this solved.
Jake: I appreciate the offer, but I work best alone. Except when it comes to sex. Actually, sometimes including sex.

Jake: I guess that's your new best friend now, Santiago. Emphasis on "Iago," backstabber.
Amy: I'm surprised you've read Othello.
Jake: What the hell's Othello? I'm calling you the parrot from Aladdin.

Captain Holt: Nothing's okay. Wuntch is circling me like a shark frenzied by chum. The task force turning into a career-threatening quagmire. An Internal Affairs investigation casting doubt upon my integrity. And you ask, is everything okay? I am buffeted by the winds of my foe's enmity and cast about by the towering waves of cruel fate. Yet I, a Captain, am no longer able to command my vessel, my precinct, from my customary helm, my office. And you ask, is everything okay? I've worked the better part of my years on earth overcoming every prejudice and fighting for the position I hold, and now I feel it being ripped from my grasp, and with it the very essence of what defines me as a man. And you ask, is everything okay?

Latest Quotes

Captain Holt: Fine, I was trying something, and it didn't work!

Captain Holt: Okay, before we get going, Sgt. Jeffords has suggested that it would improve morale if we started the meeting with some consensual non-work jabber.
Sergeant Jeffords: I just said it might be nice if you checked in on the squad's personal lives every now and then.
Captain Holt: Exactly, jabber.

Captain Holt: Scully, go.
Scully: Well, it was just a regular morning for me. Woke up again with my dog's butt on my mouth.
Captain Holt: This experiment has failed. Back to work talk.

Captain Holt: Peralta, I have a case for you.
Jake: Uh, that's a no-can-do, sir.
Captain Holt: Excuse me?
Jake: Oh, sorry. I didn't mean to come across like a rabble-rouser. We're just simply unavail. We have a meeting at a new multi-agency, multi-state task force.
Charles: It's a double multi.
Jake: It's a multi-multi.
Charles: You're better at everything than I am.
Jake: Don't say that.
Charles: It is what it is.

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